I Should Have Stayed With You
by fullmetalscully
Summary: Modern AU. Royai. A continuation from Let You Love Me. A series of oneshots from my "Let You Love Me" universe. An extra look at the life of the characters in this AU. Fluff, angst, humour, family... you name it we got it!
1. unsteady

**AN: so i've decided to go with a song theme for each oneshot so with each idea i will find a song that best fits it**

 **feel free to listen along as you read**

 **missing scene from between chapters 18 and 19**

* * *

 _ **mother, i know that you're tired of being alone**_

 _ **unsteady**_ _ **| x ambassadors**_

James tucked his duvet right up under his chin, curling into a ball as tightly as he could in his bed. He thought that if he did he wouldn't burst from the sadness that had creeped into his chest. He felt it straining in his heart, threatening to leave him any moment now in the form of a sob or tears.

Mum was on the phone to Aunt Becca. And she was crying. Again.

The only thing that kept him in bed was his curiosity. If he went out there to see her, Mum would end the phone call and pretend everything was all right. She always did. James always thought she was really strong. Mum could lift him right up over her head but she was also like the people in the stories Mrs. Short read to them at school. They were all about heroes, both men and women, who, when the world put them down and beat them up, they got right back up and kept fighting. That's what Mum was doing now. James didn't know exactly _what_ she was fighting, but it must be big if it made her this upset.

Mum was definitely like the heroes in those stories. He hadn't understood it at first, but just thinking about how upset she was now and how James _knew_ she would pretend everything was perfect in the morning… He finally did.

"I don't know if I can keep doing this Becca," she whispered, her voice wobbling like his did when he cried."James doesn't understand what is going on and I can't lie to him. I won't. It's _so hard_ already.

"No, I won't tell Roy. He has enough to deal with right now. He doesn't need a pathetic, lonely single mother breathing down his neck as well."

What was Mum lying to him about? He suddenly felt very small and very scared.

Mum always said lying was bad. Why was she doing it?

Aunt Becca must have been speaking because Mum went quiet. James strained to hear everything, but he couldn't. He only heard Mum as she sniffed then blew her nose quietly.

"I know. I know it's for the best." Silence. "No, not at all." Mum's voice turned quieter, softer. Like the voice she used when he hurt himself and he was upset. "I don't blame him for any of this. You can't choose your family. I know that better than anyone."

James had a terrifying thought pop into his head. Was she… Did she mean him? Did she not want to pick him as her son? His seven year old mind couldn't comprehend she was talking about her father.

"Roy has been…" James held his breath, listening very carefully to hear her next words. He hadn't really seen Roy much over the past few weeks. He and Mum kissed at New Year but they hadn't really been together since. That was weird though because he always thought if you kissed someone like they did it meant you loved them very much. If they loved each other like that, why were they not spending time together?

James still saw him in passing. He got really excited when he saw Roy! James was sure he was his best friend now. Jessica would always be his best friend from school, but Roy was his best adult friend. And that was really cool because he was an _adult_! No one at school had an adult best friend. He had been so proud when he found out that fact.

"Roy has been a saint." James let out a breath in relief. "He's been so understanding and respects the boundaries we've set but… I want more. God, I really do. I'm so tired of feeling so lonely." James heard her move and her voice got quieter as she moved further away. It sounded like she had moved into the kitchen. As quietly as he could, he hopped out of bed and crept to his bedroom door, pressing his ear up against the wood.

"I was so afraid after… After Matt." Matt… That was his real dad! Did he really make Mum scared? "I didn't think I wanted to love somebody again. Then _he_ came along…" She laughed quietly. "I know it's sappy but after everything, can you blame me? You're all right, Jean adores you and always has. I ended up with _this_ shit show of a love life." Silence as Aunt Becca replied. "Of course not. I wouldn't change having James for the world. How could you even ask me that?"

He grinned, his earlier fears soothed.

"Sorry," she sighed. He could almost imagine Mum pinching the hard bit of her nose, like she did when she was stressed out about something. Worry pooled in his stomach as he realised she must _actually_ be stressed out or worried. He didn't want her to feel that way. "I know, I know.

"Roy has been perfect. Sometimes I think it's too good to be true, y'know? That this will just become too much hard work for him and he'll give up. I wouldn't blame him." Her breath hitched and Mum let out a sob. James had to swallow past the lump in his own throat. It took everything in him not to rip his door open and run into her arms. She always stopped crying whenever she saw him. He could fix this.

But he was too curious. What was Mum keeping from him? Why didn't she want him to know?

"I wouldn't stop him either." She was crying now and so was James. Hot tears ran down his cheeks. Was… Was she going to leave Roy? "Of course I don't want him to. But I couldn't. It would be too unfair to ask him to stay." She took a deep breath. "This ultimately affects his life the most. It would be selfish to ask him to fight this battle if he wasn't truly invested in it."

Mum laughed, which was odd because she was still crying. "Yeah, we'll see."

The loud sound of her blowing her nose reached James' ears.

"No, I won't tell him. How is a seven year old going to understand that? He knows we can't see Roy as often anymore. I told James that he was really busy with work right now, and that isn't technically a lie.

"I just… I want it to be over.

"I know, Bec. And I appreciate the hell out of everything you do. Jean, too. To be honest if I didn't have someone to talk this through with I might explode."

Mum chuckled quietly. "Of course that's what you are for. I'm just sorry my life is such a mess. Those trashy magazines you read would have a field day with my childhood alone." Mum laughed, the sudden noise making James jump.

"I'm just… tired of it all, y'know?"

There wasn't much more to their conversation after that. James heard Mum agreeing with whatever Aunt Becca was saying, but she didn't talk much. His eyes got really tired, eyelids drooping as Aunt Becca was _still_ talking. Very shortly afterwards, Mum told Aunt Becca she loved her and hung up the phone.

Mum was crying again. He could hear it from behind his door. His hands formed fists by his side but he didn't open it. Tears ran down his cheeks but he didn't wipe them away.

Someone was hurting his Mum and he wanted to find out who. This was so unfair to Mum. She didn't deserve this.

She sighed quietly and he heard her bedroom door close across the hall. Then there was only silence.

James darted back to his bed and huddled under his duvet, going over the conversation in his head. Things seemed to be so much worse than he thought. Just that evening, they had both had a lot of fun playing hide and seek in the apartment. She acted like nothing was wrong at all.

One thing he knew was that this had something to do with Roy. Something between the two of them was making her really upset. But she had told Aunt Becca that Roy had been really good to her, so it couldn't have been Roy that was upsetting her.

He remembered waking up one night a while ago. He had heard someone knocking at their front door and coming in. James had tried to fight sleep because he thought it must be morning if someone was at the door. But the clock beside his bed had told him it was after ten o'clock at night. That was really weird.

While half asleep he had heard Mum and Roy talking. Mum had mentioned Roy's Dad. That was what drew James towards waking up. Again, he was curious. Roy had never mentioned his parents before. It didn't sound good though, from what they were saying. Was Roy's Dad the person who was hurting them both?

Then they were talking about _his_ Dad and that finally drew him out of bed. They were talking really quietly, but he _just_ managed to hear them through his bedroom door. Mum had sounded upset then, too, but Roy had told Mum that he didn't want to leave her.

Something was happening between them. James didn't know what that "something" was and he doubted he would ever find out. Mum doesn't want to tell him, so that meant it was to stop James from getting upset and to protect him. If he brought it up, that would upset Mum too and James wouldn't do that.

No matter what, from now on he wouldn't complain anymore about not getting to see Roy anymore. While it made him really sad not to be able to see him as much it obviously made Mum upset whenever he brought it up. In fact, for reasons he didn't understand, even him talking about Roy made her a bit upset.

It would be hard, and he was worried, but he would try his best.

He had already promised himself he wouldn't make Mum upset. He had made that decision once he realised that asking about his Dad and Granddad made her sad. With renewed determination he would wake up tomorrow and be on his best behaviour. It would be hard, but he would try not to mention Roy. Even the thought made James miss his best friend already, but he could do this. He could be big and strong like Mum, like those heroes in those stories.

It would hurt, but James would do it for Mum.

* * *

 **WOO so my first one shot is angsty af who would have guessed it?**

 **(i know i said oneshots but shhh) part two will be posted soon…**

 **the conversation james talks about overhearing is from chapter 10**


	2. unsteady part 2

_**dad, i know you're trying to fight when you feel like flying**_

 _ **unsteady**_ _ **| x ambassadors**_

"Whisky," Roy ordered at the bar. "Straight."

Chris' hand paused as she reached for the bottle below the bar. The restaurant was quiet tonight. It was a Monday after all. Not many people were out drinking mid-week. Well, only those who wanted to drown their sorrows in alcohol. Roy knew this wouldn't solve his problems but he was _so fucking tired_ of fighting everything. He deserved this moment of weakness.

But he wouldn't give up. He owed Riza and James that much.

Despite her hesitation, Chris still poured him his drink, eyes watching her nephew carefully as he retrieved the drink from her hands. As his eyes set on the amber liquid he was reminded so much of her eyes…

Placing it down on the bar he didn't look at it again.

"What's got you down?" Chris asked.

"Nothing."

Chris snorted. "Bullshit."

Damn her. Roy knew she wouldn't let it go until he elaborated but he really didn't feel like talking.

Then why did he come here, of all places, if he didn't want to talk?

"Tell me. It'll make you feel better." Roy sighed, wondering where to start. "Is it about your neighbour?" Roy started. How did she know about that? "When you came home with Maes last week, drunk, you kept muttering about a woman called Riza. Said you had something important to tell her." Chris shot him a pointed look as Roy felt the blush creep up in neck and onto his face. "You said you needed to see her."

Roy coughed, embarrassed by his behaviour. He didn't get embarrassed often but stumbling home drunk muttering about the woman-he-loved-but-couldn't-have was up there.

"Yeah. It's about that."

"What happened? I've never known you to get hung up on a girl before."

"It isn't just hung up…" he stated before he could stop himself.

"What then?"

"I love her."

Chris Mustang had never been stunned into silence before, Roy as sure of that. If his situation wasn't so dire he might actually be proud of how he was probably the first person to do so.

"That's… Quite a claim." Roy snorted. Without looking at it he took a large swig of his whisky. The liquid burned down his throat. It spread to his chest, washing across him. He welcomed it. It took away from the burning in his heart. "So what's the issue?"

"A certain bastard of a father."

Chris scrunched her nose up at the mention of her brother. "What did he do now?"

"What hasn't he done?" His tone was bitter but Chris was the one person he felt comfortable with to discuss these things with. He often wondered what their childhood was like, growing up together. Had his father always been the man he knew now? Did Chris feel betrayed by her brother? Any self-respecting person would hate the man he had grown into, but it must be different for Richard's own sister. Roy wondered what exactly the history was between them. He had never had the courage to ask.

"He threatened me. And threatened her." Chris eyes flashed with anger. Roy caught it out the corner of his eye as he took another drink. "He always tries to keep me in check, probably because he is well aware of just how much I know about him."

"I _will_ kill him Roy," she growled, the change in her demeanour sudden. "I swear if he hurts you, I'll kill him. Richard is well aware of that fact."

Roy huffed a humorous laugh. "That's exactly what I told him."

Silence ensued as Roy nursed his whisky. His eyes stared into the liquid, wishing that it was Riza's eyes instead.

He had been moping for weeks. His nights were plagued with torture as he remembered their kiss at New Year. Lying in his cold, empty, bed he wished her body was pressed up against his like it had been at Havoc's. Roy wanted to wake up to her hair tickling his skin as it was spread across his arm and chest, her head rising and falling in time with his breathing.

He wanted it _so badly_.

"Tell me about her."

Roy smiled involuntarily, as he was known to do whenever someone mentioned Riza Hawkeye. "She is… amazing," he breathed. His eyes found the whisky once more.

"In what way?"

"I've never met a woman like her…" Roy drifted off into his thoughts, mind wandering as he pictured his love in his mind's eye. "She is everything. She is so kind, so patient, so welcoming…"

"She is everything?" Chris queried.

"Yes." His voice was muted, emotion clouding his throat.

"So what are you going to do?"

Roy rubbed his face tiredly. "I don't know," he murmured helplessly. His head in his hands, the whisky stared right back at him. Another form of torture he had set upon himself.

"Are you going to give up?" she asked carefully.

He squeezed his eyes shut, hands gripped his hair tightly. It was a question that had been floating around in his head for weeks, among others. Was this all worth it? He often wondered Riza's thoughts on the whole thing. She said she loved him, but in reality who would stick around when something was this much trouble?

The thought of her leaving or ending things crushed him. It always had. Lying in that hospital bed he had meant what he said. He wouldn't blame her for leaving, but it might just end him.

" _What I deserve is_ you. _"_

" _There is nothing to forgive."_

He straightened, looking Chris right in the eyes.

"Never."

He had never been so sure of something in his entire life.

 _ **if you love me, don't let go**_

* * *

 **there will be fluff to come, don't worry, i just wanted to write out a scene like this because it has been sitting in my mind for** _ **weeks**_ **and i didn't think it really fit in with the flow of the main story**


	3. all i want for christmas is you

**AN: merry christmas! happy holidays!**

 **i wanted to write something cute as heck so here we are**

 **i hope you enjoy it! have a wonderful day tomorrow!**

* * *

 _ **i just want you here tonight holding on to me so tight**_

 _ **what more can i do, baby all i want for christmas is you**_

 ** _all i want for christmas is you | mariah carey_**

"Mum!" Riza heard Mia whine from the living room. She sighed heavily, feeling her headache coming on fiercer than ever. She wished for just one second this week those two would get along.

They had been bickering non-stop. James was _supposed_ to be twenty seven but he was acting like a thirteen year old, arguing over something stupid with his little sister. What made it harder was Roy was away on business over Christmas. It would be their first Christmas without him and the strain was pressing on everyone. That's why her two kids were currently arguing over who ate the last Christmas cookie.

"I swear, I'm _this_ close..." Riza muttered, stepping away from the fireplace while currently hanging the Christmas stockings. Well, trying too anyway. She had purposefully avoided looking at the one with Roy's name on it for too long, a painful reminder he wouldn't be there tomorrow morning.

Riza glared at the kids when she entered the kitchen, catching Mia smacking James' arm.

" _What_ are you two doing?"

As soon as Riza spoke the two jumped apart, terror on their faces. Mia stood with her hands behind her back, looking like a child who had been caught with their hand in the cookie jar. James just shrugged but there was a scowl on his face.

"He took the last cookie!" Mia declared accusingly, indignation clear on her face and appearing in an instant. "I was saving it for Dad for when he got home!" Riza tried to ignore the way her stomach tightened at the mention of Mia's father.

"I did _not_ ," James sighed in exasperation, emphasising every word.

"He did _too_!"

"Enough." Her voice raised ever so slightly and it was enough to shut them both up.

Riza never shouted at the kids. She hated it. As a child she had never liked being yelled at, even by a teacher. The verbal abuse she received from her father was on a whole other level, so Riza supposed the dislike came from that. So she refrained from shouting at Mia and James whenever the situation demanded it because Riza knew how awful it felt, no matter how much she wanted to bash their heads together for arguing over something _so petty_.

They were good kids. They really were. Both parents never really had a cause to raise their voices or discipline them after getting into trouble. The age gap played a large part in that. Riza knew Roy felt like it still wasn't his place to reprimand James if the situation ever arose, no matter how many times Riza reassured him. It had been slightly frustrating on her part, always looking like the "bad guy", but she understood Roy's unease.

But now, they were at that age where conflict starts to happen. Yes, James was twenty seven and should damn well know better, but Mia was a colossal wind up merchant, trying to get under his skin whenever she was feeling particularly mischievous. It was all fun and games until she was wronged in some way, causing an argument to start. The girl's mood swings were a force to be reckoned with.

So, no, she didn't like shouting at the kids, but this holiday was going to be hard enough already, she didn't need them winding each other up. At least now they looked sheepish and the argument had been dropped.

"Mia, stop wailing over nothing. We'll make more tonight."

"But he –!"

"We'll make _more,_ " Riza stressed, her headache returning with a force. "Stop trying to get your brother into trouble." Riza knew Mia didn't intend her mother to hear her muttering under her breath. Mia wilted under Riza's glare, finally dropping it. "Go and wash up," Riza commanded, her expression and voice softening. It was Christmas after all and with their father noticeably absent the last thing Riza wanted to do was alienate her family tonight. Perhaps some baking would do them all the world of good. "We'll get started before dinner."

Still looking embarrassed, Mia scurried off up the stairs to wash her hands, no doubt wanting a brief escape. Riza turned to her oldest child.

"You're almost thirty."

"I know," he mumbled.

"So why are you fighting with a thirteen year old over a _cookie_?"

Now _he_ looked indignant. "I didn't take the damn thing!"

" _Language_ ," Riza growled. "I don't care if you did or you didn't, why are you arguing with your sister over it? You should know better."

He cast his eyes down to the floor, looking like a seven year old again. It hit her hard just how old her son was. Sure, he was acting like a baby, but he wasn't one anymore. This was his first Christmas not living at home as well, both James and Jessica had bought their own house a couple of months ago. Riza had feared that he wouldn't want to come home for the holidays but her son reassured her he'd be there. Jessica was staying at her own parent's house on the other side of Central and she was joining them for Christmas dinner tomorrow afternoon, before the two of them spent the night with Jessica's parents.

"Sorry, Mum." His eyes rose and met hers. "You're right, I _should_ know better. I wasn't really thinking and I know it's going to be hard without Dad here this year too. That's why I wanted to make sure I was going to be home for Christmas," he admitted. He laughed nervously, rubbing the back of neck. It was a habit he had picked up from Roy when he was in his early teenage years. "Jessica's parents weren't very happy about it but I wasn't going to leave you alone."

Sighing, Riza leaned her back against the island in the middle of their kitchen. "You didn't need to come home. She's your fiancé, you can still go and spend Christmas with Jessica." Riza felt bad that he had changed his plans just to suit her. It was _her_ job to sacrifice things for James, not the other way around. She had already done it so often when he was growing up, it felt like second nature to her, even now. However it still hurt, the thought of him not being home for Christmas.

Riza had always wanted her family together for the holidays. It was slightly more difficult now, what with James and Jessica being engaged, but she still wanted her son to be here on Christmas morning. Perhaps a part of her was still clinging to the past, to his childhood when it had just been the two of them. All the hardship she had endured that year, all the money she had to save up in order to buy James his presents to ensure he wasn't disappointed in the morning, was all worth it seeing his little face light up at the sheer amount of gifts she'd gotten him.

The first year he had "bought" her a gift Riza had actually cried. James had been five and had asked his Uncle Jean if he could get a present for his Mum, "because she always gets me presents". Of course, Rebecca swore it was all James, but Riza had a strong suspicion a certain unofficial Aunt and Uncle had assisted in his endeavour.

"Why you not opening anything Mummy?" her four year old had asked, sitting surrounded in wrapping paper, his brow creased.

"Because I already have the best gift I could have asked Santa for," Riza replied, scooping her son up into her arms.

"What is it?" he asked excitedly, craning his neck and looking around the floor at the sea of wrapping paper.

"You."

"Of course not," James replied, dragging Riza back to the present. He joined her by leaning on the counter himself. "I'll see her tomorrow anyway. I know you won't technically be alone, Little Miss Drama Queen upstairs makes too much noise on a day-to-day basis that there's no way you could miss her in the house." Riza chuckled at that, the arms folded across her chest tightening around her torso. "But… it's tradition. It is _our_ tradition. I'm always with you for Christmas."

What did she ever do to deserve such a wonderful boy?

"That –" Riza found herself clearing her throat, trying to rid herself of the emotion there, but it didn't work. James smiled softly and drew her into a hug, one she returned eagerly. He was even _taller_ than her now. It was so unfair. Her little boy was all grown up. "Thank you," she whispered into his ugly Christmas jumper. Roy had bought them all one two years ago.

Riza's was green, red, and white, with "Daschund through the snow" written across the chest. There was even a picture of the dog on it, complete with a Santa hat. It was truly an ugly sweater, the colour scheme truly offending to the eye. Riza loved it.

James' was Spider Man themed, despite having past that stage years ago. Still, he had grinned and looked genuinely pleased upon opening it. It was a blue base with a mock spider man suit covering the centre of the chest up to the shoulders. The Spider Man logo and snowflakes filled in the pattern of the bottom half of the jumper.

Mia's, of course, had a bear on it. It was navy blue with a brown bear wearing a comically small Santa hat and a red polka-dot scarf. Snowflakes filled in the background, making it a lot classier than Riza's. Not that Riza minded at all. In her opinion, the uglier the better. It was slightly silly that Roy still bought Mia merchandise with bears on it, but the nickname had stuck with her. However, being a teenager and being called "bear" by your father was hardly the peak of cool, but Mia was a good sport, knowing how much it meant to Roy, so played along. Whenever the kids at school snickered about it, Mia just shrugged, the reaction making her embrace her childhood nickname fiercely.

Roy had been so excited while they were all opening them, a goofy smile on his face. He had even wrapped one for himself, his plan to not give the game away. Riza had just shook her head and grinned when he revealed his. It was read with the pattern of a brick wall and on the front, sticking right out from the torso, was a reindeer's head. It came complete with a wreath around the head and antlers, decorated with bells so whenever he moved, the bells sounded. Roy had been _far_ too excited about it.

"Of _course_ you would buy something like that," James commented, rolling his eyes.

"What?" he asked, mildly affronted. "I think it's hilarious!"

"Of course you do, dear," Riza deadpanned, patting his head, causing Mia and James to snicker.

Mia returned to the kitchen and Riza beckoned her in with a smile, giving her daughter a quick hug before they started baking. At least for a couple of hours her mind was taken off the fact that they were one person short.

Her daughter was practically bouncing with excitement as she got ready for bed. At ten o'clock Mia was so hyped up she was sitting cross legged on her bed, jumping on the spot.

"Mia," Riza scolded gently, but grinned while standing at the doorway after poking head in to see what all the noise was about. Mia's excitement was infectious. "Go to sleep or Santa won't come."

"Sure, Mum," Mia replied, rolling her eyes, the twinkle in her eyes never leaving. She was past believing in Old Saint Nick, but she still adored the holiday. It had never been Riza's favourite holiday, it was always just another day of the year, but over the years – especially after meeting Roy – it had quickly become her favourite, so she could share in Mia's enthusiasm.

Roy… Riza's stomach sank, her smile faltering. He would be alone tomorrow in a hotel room in South City. Plastering a smile back on her face, she returned her attention to the animated teenager.

"Go to sleep, Mia," she said gently. "I love you."

"Love you too, Mum," Mia replied, the look on her face telling Riza she wasn't going to sleep anytime soon. Giving up a losing battle, Riza smiled and closed the bedroom door.

Returning to the living room Riza's stomach tightened as she spotted her phone on the arm of the chair. Without pause she picked it up and dialled Roy's number.

"Hey, Riza," he greeted softly. She could hear the smile in his tone. Sighing quietly to herself, simply pleased to hear his rich, deep voice once again, Riza settled into the couch. He had been away for a week already and to say she missed her husband was an understatement.

"Hey, Roy." There were bustling noises in the background, apparently he was somewhere busy.

"How are you? How are the kids?"

"They're fine. Mia's too excited to sleep as usual." Riza couldn't stop the grin that spread on her face.

Roy chuckled, the sound warming her chest. She let it wash over her, indulging herself. "That sounds about right. What about James?"

"He's on the phone to Jessica now."

"So he's staying home for Christmas?" Roy asked, slightly surprised. The last time they spoke James had been unsure of his plans for Christmas Day. "That's good then. I didn't want it to just be the two of you." Riza's stomach clenched once more. "But I did notice you failed to answer my question," he chuckled but even that sounded strained.

"Oh?"

"How are you?"

The urge to reply with her true feelings almost overrode her mind. She wanted to tell him that despite having the kids here, she felt inexplicably miserable. She wanted Roy to be here. She wanted him next to her, not a thousand miles away across the country. Once the kids went to bed, every Christmas Eve they would watch a trashy Christmas movie on the Hallmark channel and Riza would never feel more content than in that moment. He would sit with his arms around her, pulling her tightly to his body on the couch. Roy would whisper how much he loved in her in her ear and Riza would respond in kind with a kiss so passionate they would forget all about the movie.

"Fine." Her breath hitched quietly, body betraying her mind.

"Riza?" he asked, concerned and noting the quiet intake of breath.

"Yes?"

He sighed loudly. "I'm sorry," he replied miserably. "I really wish I could be there. I know how much this holiday means to you, especially after…" he trailed off as if realising exactly where his train of thought was headed. He rarely mentioned her past, knowing how much it still pained her to this day. "Well, I know how much it means to you. I hate this."

"It's okay," Riza reassured him. It wasn't his fault he had been sent on a business trip to South City to oversee the opening of a new precinct. On the one hand Riza was proud that Roy had been chosen specifically. On the other, she was disgruntled because who sent a father away from his family at Christmas? Being a Captain in Central had brought a lot more responsibility and Roy often brought his work home with him, Riza understood and supported that. His work rarely ever stopped. Roy could be called away at a moment's notice and he was dedicated to his work, to making the world a better place. But it was _Christmas_. Officer or no, he deserved a break. Apparently criminals didn't see it that way.

Perhaps it was selfish of Riza to think that. It probably was, she surmised. However it didn't stop the feelings from creeping up every now and again. She justified them by reminding herself of everything she had been through she deserved to see her husband at Christmas.

"It's not okay," he replied, tone firm. "I'll make it up to you, I swear." Riza opened her mouth to reply but an announcement sounded through the phone. She winced at the piercing sound in her ear, but Roy must have covered the mouth piece because she couldn't make out what was being said. "I'm really sorry, love, but I have to go."

"Oh, okay." Her heart sank in her chest a little more. If it even could go any lower.

"Sorry," he sighed, frustration clear in his voice. She could almost picture him running a hand through his hair. "I will give you a call tomorrow morning, okay? Around seven?" Another announcement sounded, cutting off their conversation.

"Okay. I'm sure we will be up," she added, a wry smile on her face. They would definitely be up by seven.

Roy chuckled and once more Riza let it wash over her, trying to draw out this conversation for as long as possible. She didn't want Roy to go. "You will be up, washed, and dressed in that time." Riza smiled to herself. "I love you, Riza," he announced, voice earnest as if it was a way of apologising for his absence.

"I love you too."

"Tell the kids I love them, and say Merry Christmas."

"I will. Take care." Her voice was quiet as she bid him goodbye. Upon hitting "end call" she felt a familiar loneliness creep up on her.

"Mum?" James asked quietly so not to startle her.

Riza jumped and turned in the chair, blinking away her tears. She wasn't alone. She never had been.

"Hey, James. Shouldn't you be in bed?" She offered a weak smile, her expression telling her son she was only joking.

"I'm on my way, don't worry. I wouldn't want to stay up too late so that Santa wouldn't arrive," he grinned, taking a place next to his mother on the couch. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Riza bit her lip, the action reminding her so much of her husband.

"No, we wouldn't want that," Riza replied.

"Plus, if we don't go to sleep now, then we'll be exhausted tomorrow. What time do you think Mia will be up?" The three of them had begun to take bets years ago on how early Mia would wake up. Her record was four thirty when she was eight, when she was promptly told to go back to sleep. Of course, she didn't and had to go for a "Christmas nap" before they visited Aunt Chris.

Riza chuckled, wiping away a tear. "I picked six."

James whistled. "That's ambitious. I'm going for five."

"I guess we'll see who wins in the morning. How's Jessica?" James' face lit up at the mention of his fiancé, as it always did. He was so hopelessly in love with her it was adorable.

"She's great and about as excited as Mia," he chuckled. "No wonder they get on so well." Mia and Jessica really did get along. Their dynamic was very much like two sisters, like they had grown up together. When Riza considered the age gap, she supposed they _had_ grown up together. Both she and James had gotten together when Mia was only four. Mia was almost as close with Jessica as she was with James.

Riza always smiled when she remembered about how they had come together. It had been painfully slow, both knowing they really liked each other – and had done for years – but both too scared to finally admit it. Riza had guessed it was to do with their friendship. Roy agreed, theorising they probably didn't want to ruin that.

"I'm glad to hear it." Riza stood to pocket her phone before moving towards their Christmas tree to turn the lights off.

"I'll lock up," James offered. "You go to bed."

Riza squeezed James' hand before taking herself up to bed.

It hadn't been a restful night's sleep, that's for sure. Riza always found it difficult to sleep whenever Roy wasn't with her. She saw every hour which didn't bode well for the family's busy day ahead. They would spend Christmas morning opening presents then at nine o'clock they would head to Roy's mother's house, where more presents would be distributed. For Christmas dinner, around about two o'clock, they visited Chris in Central who cooked for the whole family – all of Roy's adoptive siblings and their partners, and Roy's mother and her family. It was dinner on an incredible scale and Riza always wondered how the hell Chris managed it. The woman was a professional, but still, she was a force to be reckoned with when it came to being a hostess.

Riza had watched bemused the first year they had visited with Mia only six months old. The production line Chris Mustang ran to ensure everything was ready was incredible. Everyone joined in. Riza had been let off the hook because she still wasn't back to full strength after Mia decided to prematurely enter the world. Roy just wanted to show off his daughter to everyone but Chris had quickly put a stop to that, commandeering his services and putting her nephew to work. He had pouted over the carrots he was peeling, continually stealing glances at his new-born daughter. His attention had been so divided he almost cut his finger off with the knife. That had been pretty funny. He still had a small scar where the knife had nicked his finger. Chris eyed it once, slapped a plaster on it once it had stopped bleeding, and warned Roy that he better not bleed all over her carrots or there would be hell to pay.

The party at Chris' would last until the late hours and it was always a great time. It was always interesting because she would get to find out more about his family and there was always a new embarrassing story from his childhood that she hadn't heard yet.

Going from what Riza used to do on Christmas as a child to what they did now was a great leap but that was why she enjoyed the holiday so much. It was full of love and enjoyment, two things that had been non-existent for her growing up.

The day after Christmas was another party night but this time at Jean and Rebecca's. The kids would all play together while the adults essentially just got drunk. That was always an amusing affair for all involved. They stayed overnight so it was nice to have the chance to let loose.

There was a knock on her door, rousing Riza from her fitful sleep, and a cautious voice called out to her.

"Mum?" Mia asked. There were another set of footsteps behind her, indicating she had also wrangled James awake. To be perfectly honest, he was just as bad as their youngest on Christmas morning. As soon as Mia knocked on James' door he was awake and bright as a button.

Automatically Riza reached out to nudge Roy awake, as she had done for years prior, expecting to hear him grunt then groan in response to the early hour. But her hand found nothing but empty sheets. It didn't help she was sleeping on his side either so his scent wrapped around her and in her semi-conscious state she could almost imagine he was lying next to her.

With a sigh she leaned on an elbow to check her alarm clock. It read ten past six. Riza smirked. She had been the closest with the time. Mia must be getting older because that was a new record. That time was considered a long lie on Christmas morning where Mia was concerned.

"Come in,"Riza sighed, grinning at a particularly excited girl stood in the doorway. Sure enough, James was behind her, the same twinkle of excitement and anticipation in both their eyes.

"It's Christmas!" Mia suddenly yelled, making Riza wince at the volume. However nothing would stop her little tornado as Mia sprinted across the room and jumped on the bed, continually announcing it was Christmas. Riza just smiled at her antics, making her way to their en suite bathroom to prepare herself for the day.

Once ready, Riza hugged both her kids extra tight, wishing them a Merry Christmas.

"Merry Christmas Mum!" Mia sang, finally stopping from bouncing on her bed. For a second she paused eyes falling on the empty bed.

"Dad said he would call around seven o'clock to speak to you both," Riza informed them, noticing the way Mia's face fell slightly. The sight made Riza's chest tighten.

"Oh, yay!" she reacted to the news with even more excitement. "I can't _wait_ to speak to him. I asked Santa for an _awesome_ present for Dad this year. I'm so excited to see his face when he opens it!"

James had helped Mia pick out a gift for each of them so Riza didn't actually know what it was they would be receiving. She had assured her son he didn't need to go wild with presents, but knowing him, James liked to spoil them. Riza was pleased he was in a financial position to do so, but he really didn't need to.

"I know, Mum," he reassured her. "But I want to. This of it as a thank you for all you did for me over the years, and for all Roy did for both of us too." His words and grin brought a tear to her eye.

"Come on then," Riza announced dramatically. "I suppose we should go and see if Santa has dropped off your presents."

"Mum," Mia moaned good-naturedly, heavily indicating she _knew_ Santa wasn't real. Her next words said the exact same thing.

She missed how James would write a letter to Santa when he was younger, listing all the things he would like for his Christmas. When it had become Mia's turn Riza had been thrilled to go through it all again. That was her favourite time of their childhood, when the magic of the holiday was real.

"Of course Santa is real," Riza retorted, beginning her descent down the stairs. "Who do you think knows exactly what you want?"

"You and Dad do, silly."

Riza shook her head, switching on the hall light. "Yes and we pass it on to Santa."

Light from the living room caught her eye. Hadn't James turned those lights off last night? She was sure he would have. With Mia talking she never got the chance to ask him.

Opening the door she stopped in her tracks.

Oh, the Christmas tree lights were on all right but what drew her attention was the person sitting in the armchair next to the tree, scrolling through their phone.

"Ah, I thought you were never going to get up," Roy grinned cheekily, his face lighting up at the shock on all three of their faces.

Riza was frozen in the doorway, hand still gripping the handle tightly.

Roy was here.

He was _home_.

"Daddy!" Mia practically screeched, ducking under Riza's still outstretched arm and launching herself into the room then into her father's arms. He laughed and caught her just as he knelt down to her level, standing straight while Mia wrapped her legs around his waist. She was far too old to be lifted in such a way, but nobody ever complained.

"Hello bear!" he greeted with a chuckle, ruffling her bedhead. "You're up late! Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas Dad! I can't believe you are home! Mum said you wouldn't be home until after Christmas."

"I know," Roy replied, winking at Riza when their eyes met. "There was a slight change of plans."

"Oh, this is the _best_ Christmas present!" Mia fiercely hugged her father, burying her face into his jumper. "And Santa _has_ been Mum, I told you!" Mia extracted herself from Roy's hold, beginning to pull presents out from underneath the tree and sorting them into piles.

James chuckled and hugged Roy, his feet working before Riza's. She still couldn't quite believe he was home. Mia was right, this was the best Christmas present. Ever.

"Merry Christmas, Dad."

"Merry Christmas, bud," Roy smiled, slapping James amicably on the back. "Go on, dig in," Roy gestured to the pile of presents. "You will need to catch up with your sister." Said sister was carefully handling each of the presents in her pile, shaking them gently to try and determine what was in them.

Roy closed the distance between them, a soft smile on his face. A hand cupped her jaw, thumb stroking her cheek and wiping away a stray tear at the same time. He kissed her softly and it was as if Riza's body had finally come alive after her shock. She threw her arms around his neck, drawing him in close and increasing the intensity of the kiss. Roy smiled against her lips, a chuckle rumbling deep in his chest.

"That is the best way to say hello," he murmured.

"How did you… When…?"

"We finished earlier than anticipated. The Captain had a change of heart and let us all go home early. I flew in overnight."

"When did you land?"

"About two hours ago."

She studied his face, noticing the tired lines and dark circles under his eyes. They were partially there with age but Riza knew the signs of his stress. The stress of this week had plagued him as well. She stroked under his eyes gently with her thumb and Roy's eyes fluttered closed.

"When did you get home?"

"An hour ago."

Riza smile spread across her face. "Were you down here the whole time?" Her question caused him to smirk. He was particularly pleased about his little stunt that was for sure.

"I wanted it to be a surprise."

"Well it was the best kind. Have you gotten any sleep?"

He nodded. "I slept in the airport for a couple of hours. My flight was at one this morning but we finished at four in the afternoon yesterday so after I had something to eat I slept most of the evening." He shrugged. "I had nothing better to do. I slept on the plane as well."

She kissed him again, but softly this time, as if reassuring herself he was really here.

"This is… amazing." More tears sprung to her eyes. "I missed you," she admitted quietly.

"I missed you too. I wouldn't have missed this moment for the world."

"Thank you," she breathed. Her arms snaked down to his waist and locked in, holding his body tightly against hers. She turned her head, dipping it ever so slightly so her cheek rested against his chest. His heart beat strongly under her ear and she closed her eyes briefly, simply listening to it.

Mia and James shared a look. Both had been watching the exchange while their parents shared their moment. When the two adults finally turned their attention back to them, they shared a grin then began tearing open wrapping paper.

Riza's smaller pile of presents sat off to the right with Roy's pile next to it. She would open them once Mia and James were finished because she didn't want to let go of Roy just yet. He had slung his arm around her shoulders while Riza's snaked across his back and around his waist. Her other hand rested on his chest, trying to remain as close to him as possible. The excitement on both their kid's faces after opening their gifts was enough of a present for the parents.

This truly was the best Christmas.

* * *

 **i know this was cheesy as hell but i really dont care because royai deserve all the happiness in the world together in this au**

 **those ugly christmas sweaters are all ones you can buy btw and they are incredible**


	4. my last goodbye

**thank you to worldeater337 on tumblr for helping with this one! half the ideas come from them, got gonna lie!**

 **so sorry but i really wanted to write something where riza goes ape and i thought this would be best (insert devil emoji).** **this idea was actually taken from a book i read as a kid (thank you jacqueline wilson! im 90% sure the book was clean break i don't own it anymore so i can't check) with a similar idea, ive just altered it slightly to fit the characters and the au**

 **i think this song is perfect for riza and matt too bc for so long she tried to hold onto him especially after james was born but he left her just like that with no word of goodbye or why**

* * *

 _ **my passion, my poison, the life and death of me**_

 _ **i can't take you taking everything**_

 _ **from a love never meant to be**_

 _ **my last goodbye | trading yesterday**_

"Hey, James!"

James froze in the playground, mouth agape as he looked towards the school gates at the unexpected visitor. He hadn't seen his real Dad in a while. Why was he here now at his school?

"James?" Jessica asked him, brow furrowing in confusion once she realised he had stopped running. She jogged back to him, ponytail bobbing as she did so. "What's wrong?" Jessica turned towards the gate and spotted his real father. Matt waved him over. "Who is that?"

"That's… my Dad."

Jessica frowned. "I thought Roy was your Dad."

"He is," James replied. Where before his replies had been as if he was in a daze, this one snapped him out of it. His tone was fierce as he corrected his friend.

"Then who is that then?"

James shook his head, both to knowing how to and not wanting to get into it all. After their first meeting in that café James had told Matt he never wanted to see him again. However, once he was home he felt slightly bad about it. So, Roy had escorted him to another meeting. Dad hadn't liked it, but he had drove him there anyway. Over the last year or so they had only met a couple of times and it was always when Mum or Dad were with James. They had never met together with just the two of them.

"Hey… Matt," James greeted nervously as he approached the gate, leaving Jessica and Ben to wonder behind him.

Matt smiled down at James before crouching to his level. James just watched him carefully through the bars.

"How are you doing today, James?"

"I'm all right."

"Good. Your Mum told me you had a dentist appointment today." James remembered Mum mentioning it, but was it today?

James hesitated. "I think I do, yeah."

Matt smiled. "I was thinking we could go and eat some lunch together and I could take you?"

Mum said she would come and collect him after school. Would she send Matt over instead? James had overheard her and Dad talking and he remembered Mum saying she didn't want James to meet Matt on his own.

"I've already had my lunch."

"Okay, how about we go and have a chat somewhere. I notice you have Spider Man on your jumper." James looked down at the pin Roy had placed on his jumper that morning. They weren't really allowed to wear pins at school but James kept it hidden under his school blazer. Roy had given it to him and he didn't want to take it off. When he was running around playing at lunch time it was too hot to keep his blazer on, so it was in full view. "He's my favourite superhero too."

James was torn. He wanted to stay and play with Jessica and Ben. They had come up with a good game at morning break and wanted to continue it. However, it wasn't often that James got to speak to his real Dad alone and he was curious. He wanted to know a bit more about Matt and ask questions he was too scared to when Mum and Dad were there.

So he nodded.

"Okay. I'll go and get my bag."

Matt grinned. "I've already told the school we are going."

That was weird. Mum said she always had to organise dentist appointments around school times because they wouldn't let James leave unless it was an emergency. Maybe they thought because he never really saw his real Dad they would let him off just this once?

"What did he want?" Jessica asked James once he jogged back over to them. "Where are you going?" she asked when he picked up his bag.

"My Dad has come to pick me up to take me to the dentist." James had begun to feel pretty excited. He was going to spend some time alone with his Dad. This would be pretty cool. Plus, he got to miss out on reading this afternoon which he hated. Well, James didn't so much hate the exercise, he just couldn't stand the book the class were reading. Charlotte's Web wasn't as exciting as he had hoped.

"You're leaving school _now_?" Jessica asked, eyes wide as saucers. She lowered her voice to a whisper.

"What?" Ben asked. "That's lucky!"

James grinned. "We're going out for something to eat and we're going to do some fun stuff!"

"I wish my Dad would do that," Ben sighed. "I don't want to read Charlotte's Web this afternoon!" he wailed.

"Bye guys!"

"James, you can't go!" Jessica called after him, but he was already gone. With a smile on his face and excitement coursing through him he opened the school gates and approached his real dad. He felt kind of nervous. What would they talk about? Matt had said he liked Spider Man. He would start with that.

Matt walked them to his car and James went to open the door to the backseat.

"Where are you going?" Matt asked.

"Sitting in the backseat. I always sit in the back."

"How would you like to sit in the front?"

James' face lit up. He had never sat in the front before! This would be so cool! "Okay!"

Once in place James looked around him, grinning at the amount of leg room he had. He could swing his legs and not hit it off the seat in front of him. Wait until he told Mum and Dad that he had sat in the front seat!

Matt took him to the city centre, parking in the car park attached to the Mall of Central. They walked through the shopping centre and James looked around in wonder. It was so much quieter than when he had come before with Mum. There weren't any kids anywhere, just adults moving from shop to shop. People gave him slightly odd looks but he didn't bother paying attention to them. He was too in awe of the massive stand of chocolates in front of a fountain.

"Do you want one, James?" Matt asked him.

He paused. He shouldn't. Mum said he couldn't have chocolate during the day at school because it sometimes gave him a bit of a tummy ache. But… he technically wasn't at school anymore. Surely that meant he could have some?

"Yeah, okay!"

James swung his legs happily on the bench they had claimed while he ate his chocolate bunny. It was bigger than his fist! And, it was all for him. He had never ate this much chocolate in one go before. It was so exciting!

"Would you like some ice cream?" Matt asked as they were walking past the stall.

James laughed. "It's too cold for ice cream Dad!" He didn't even catch himself calling Matt Dad, rather than by his name like he had promised himself he would.

"It's always time for ice cream," Matt grinned. "I like chocolate. What would you like?"

"Can I get strawberry?" he asked politely. He figured if he asked _really_ nicely then he would get it no problem. He really liked strawberry ice cream after all.

"Of course you can, kiddo," Matt replied, ruffling James' hair. He swatted Matt's hand away and his real Dad just laughed. "Your Mum used to do that to me too."

"It's annoying," James pouted.

"Yeah, you definitely take after her."

After eating their ice cream and chatting for a little while James started to get a bit of a sore tummy. He placed a hand on it and grimaced. Matt noticed.

"Are you okay, James?" he asked, a concerned look on his face.

James bit his lip. He kind of wanted to go home. Whenever he would get a sore tummy he would lie on the couch and Mum would stroke his hair until he fell asleep. Then, when he woke up, the pain would be gone. She always made things better but he still had to go to the dentist.

"Just got a bit of a sore tummy," he mumbled in response. "It happens sometimes when I have too much chocolate."

"Oh." Matt straightened up. "Do you want to go home?" He looked kind of sad about that but James _really_ wanted to go home. He wanted Mum to make him all better. So he nodded. Matt sighed quietly, but nodded. "Okay kiddo, we will head back to your Mum's."

"What about the dentist?"

Matt froze in his seat. When he replied, he didn't look at James. "I'll give them a call and say you aren't feeling well and I'll get your Mum to schedule it for another time." James nodded.

Once in the car, James squirmed as unnoticeably as he could. He was really uncomfortable now. His tummy clenched and he whimpered without meaning it.

"How are you doing?" Matt asked.

"It hurts," he whined.

"I know, kiddo. Sorry, I didn't realise you couldn't have too much sugar. I'll know for next time though."

James leaned against the door and stared out of the window, shivering as his forehead made contact with the cold glass. It had started getting colder at night now that summer was over, the days becoming shorter as the sun set earlier in the day. James noticed the sun began to set at around half past four in the afternoon. Mum had bought him a watch to help him practice telling the time so he had checked it before they left the shopping centre. It had been four o'clock then. He was all right with telling the time digitally, but analogue clocks still threw him.

What James thought was strange, and he never noticed it until now, was that his dentist appointments were always right after school. Normally they were home before it got dark, except when it was the middle of winter.

Uncertainty pooled in James' stomach and he wasn't quite sure why. Brushing it aside, he focused on the cool day he had had with Matt. James hadn't expected it to be so much fun. Mum and Dad were never happy about him meeting with Matt, but they did it anyway because James wanted to. Hopefully now they had had a day out together Mum and Dad wouldn't need to come along with James anymore. Not because he didn't want them there, but because he knew it made them unhappy.

James lifted his head when he spotted a police car outside his apartment building. Dad's car was sitting behind it with its own siren on top, one of those removable ones he had shown James when Dad had taken him for a visit to the station.

Was everything okay?

* * *

Riza was running slightly late as she rushed to pick James up from school. She arrived in the playground just moments after the bell rang, breathless. Her eyes scanned the concrete area that was currently filled with kids and their parents but there was no sign of James. She spotted Jessica and calmed herself, giving the girl a small wave. Jessica frowned at Riza, which the older woman thought was odd.

"Hey, Jessica."

"Hello, Miss Hawkeye," she replied politely, but her frown never disappeared. Riza was always uncomfortable with that title, never mind the fact it had come from a twelve year old. Many parents from this school would appreciate the use of their title like that, but Riza didn't. She just wanted to be Riza to James' friends. She was too young to be a "Miss" anything. "What are you doing here?" Jessica asked.

Her mother looked slightly horrified at her daughter's question and began to scold the child. Before she could Riza smiled and crouched down to her level.

"I am here to pick up James, like always."

Jessica blinked. "But he's not here."

Riza felt her stomach drop out of her body. "What?"

"He's not here," she repeated. "His Dad came and picked him up at lunch time. He said he was taking James to the dentist."

What? Why would Roy take James out of school? He didn't even _have_ the dentist today, it was tomorrow.

"Oh. Okay," Riza replied but her mind was already running a mile a minute. Something was definitely _not_ right here and she wanted to know why. Roy wouldn't just remove James from school.

Fearing the worst already she excused herself from Jessica and her mother. Ripping her phone out of her pocket in her haste she dialled Roy's number. She was probably worrying over nothing. Her phone had been turned off while it was charging before she left. Riza had forgotten to collect it once it was done so it had been sitting on charge, turned off, since about lunch time. It was possible Roy _had_ come to collect James because the school couldn't get through to her. Since it was turned off, Roy hadn't been able to reach her either. Foregoing checking if she had any voicemail she had opted to call Roy directly.

The sound of the phone ringing felt like the longest stretch of time in her life.

"Mustang," Roy greeted through the phone.

"Hey, it's me. Did you pick James up from school this afternoon?" The desperation took over in her voice without her realising.

"No. Why?"

Riza could have dropped the phone there and then. Her breath caught in her throat.

 _Where was her son?_

"Riza? Is everything okay?"

"Where is he?" she whispered to herself fearfully.

Every worst possible scenario ran through her head, every thought of him being abducted dominated her mind. Her throat closed, breath becoming strangled as she imagined a man coming to pick up her little boy from school without informing anyone.

 _ **Where was her son?**_

"Whoa, what's going on?" Roy asked urgently. "Where's James?"

"I don't know," she stuttered. "Jessica said he'd been picked up at lunch time."

"Okay, I need you to calm down," his voice soothed. "I need you to talk to Jessica and find out what happened. Or, hand the phone over and I'll talk to her."

Riza nodded, head whipping around to find Jessica once more. The girl and her mother hadn't moved from their spot, opting to remain to see if everything was all right with Riza before leaving. Jessica looked slightly scared when she noticed the look on Riza's face and her mother – Elaine – looked extremely worried.

"Is everything all right?" Elaine asked, gripping her daughter's hand tighter.

"Riza, hand the phone over to Jessica," Roy urged gently. "Let me speak to her."

"Jessica," Riza began, almost joking on her own words as the panic threatened to overwhelm her. "Can you tell Roy exactly what happened when James left?"

Jessica nodded, her reply in a voice so small it was so unlike her. "Yeah."

The pair spoke for a few minutes, Jessica relaying exactly what had happened. Riza knew she should be paying attention but she couldn't. The only thought that consumed her mind was " _my little boy is missing_ ". Elaine had come over to Riza and, in an unexpected move, wrapped an arm around Riza's shoulders.

"He wants to speak to you again," Jessica told her. The girl looked on the verge of tears.

"Thank you." She took the phone from the girl, hands shaking. Elaine's grip on her shoulders tightened in support. "Hello?"

"Hey. Okay, so, Jessica told me it was a man with brown hair who came to pick up James, and that it was his "Dad", so my first guess is it was Matt." Riza gripped the phone tightly. Why would _he_ come and pick James up? "James seemed happy to go with him so that's why I've ruled out him being abducted." Riza whimpered at the use of his words. "I'm sorry, love," Roy added, his voice dropping his professional tone. "I'm leaving work now. Stay at the school. Go to the office and ask them if they know anything about it."

Riza nodded, forgetting Roy wouldn't be able to see her.

"Riza?" he prompted for a response.

"Okay."

"I'll see you in a bit. Love you."

Riza hung up in a daze. Matt had come to pick James up from school. Why? What purpose did that serve? And where were they now? Why didn't Matt get into contact with her to say he was taking James?

A string of malicious thoughts entered her mind. Matt had never been happy about the fact Riza had moved on. He wasn't thrilled that James called Roy Dad and called his real father by his first name. Was this a way to get back at them? Had he _kidnapped_ James?

Riza thought she might vomit.

"Why don't we go and ask the people in the office if they know anything about it?" Elaine offered. When Riza didn't answer the older woman just guided her by the arm towards the main entrance, Jessica tagging worriedly behind.

"Where's James, Mum?" she asked. Riza winced at Jessica's question.

"That's what we're trying to find out, sweetie."

The lady in the office didn't know anything about it. James' teacher, Mr. Paul, had contacted them about his absence but they had received no confirmation from a parent that James had left school for the day. Riza felt herself pale even more, blood running cold. She simply stared at Mr. Paul as he frantically explained the situation, on the verge of tears himself. Of course, he still had a class to teach so he had asked his teaching assistant to take over the class while he reported the missing child. The whole office had apparently been in an uproar all afternoon.

"I personally tried to contact you but there was no answer," he added.

Of course.

Her phone had been turned off.

Mr. Paul stiffened when she revealed that snippet of information.

"We don't have any other emergency contact numbers on the system for him either."

Riza had meant to add Rebecca and Jean's numbers on to James' school file, but it had slipped her mind. The thought had never even occurred to her with Roy's number.

 _Idiot_.

"Okay, I have the footage ready," the administrator informed them, referring to the school's surveillance footage. "For security reasons I cannot allow you to view it personally however I've taken a screenshot and printed it out." The woman handed Riza a picture of James by the school gates. Someone was on the other side, crouched down to his level, but Riza could see the brown hair on his head. She was handed another. It was definitely Matt. "Do you know this man?"

Riza nodded. "That's James' biological father."

The administrator nodded. "Well, we have an identity at least. Shall I phone the police?"

Riza shook her head. Roy was on the way already and there was nobody she trusted more to find her son than him. "My husband is on the way now. He's a detective."

The woman nodded, relaxing slightly. "All right then. You're welcome to wait here until he arrives."

Riza settled into the chair she offered, numb.

Why had Matt taken James? Why hadn't he _told_ her?

When Roy walked through the door looking borderline frantic as he searched for Riza that was the only time she lifted her head from the floor. The pair met in the middle of the room, arms circling tightly round one another. She buried her face in his shoulder, feeling the cold from his overcoat seeping into her skin while her arms circled around Roy's waist. A hand was placed on the back of her head to hold it in place while the other wrapped around her back tightly. Riza's shoulder bag fell to the floor, forgotten.

"It's okay," Roy whispered quietly to her, to reassure her. "It's going to be okay." Riza let her tears fall as her hand fisted in his jacket but she uttered no sound. "We _will_ find him. I won't rest until we do."

Once she had calmed down, Riza told Roy everything they had discovered, offering him the two photographs. He studied them carefully and Riza watched as he switched into "detective mode". He asked the office staff and his teacher all the relevant questions, some she hadn't even thought of. Once he had finished his questioning Roy suggested they go home.

That was the last place Riza wanted to go.

At home there were reminders of her son all over the place. At home she would just be waiting for him to walk through the door. Or waiting to receive a phone call that he… That James… Riza burst into tears before she could finish the thought. _That he was no longer coming home_.

Roy excused them both and escorted Riza from the building.

"It's going to be all right, I promise," Roy urged. He acted as if the arm around her shoulders was keeping her upright and to be perfectly honest, he wasn't wrong. Her movements were clumsy as she walked, occasionally tripping over her own feet. Riza's mind was too preoccupied with a number of worst case scenarios to concentrate on the basic movements of walking.

Roy opened the car door for her. Once entering himself he sped off into the traffic towards their apartment. "I've contacted Havoc and asked for a small team to meet us at the apartment. I'll send out four teams of two to look around busy areas like the park and Central Mall. Those are two places James likes to go. If Matt has taken him out for the afternoon to somewhere James would like to go then those are likely places. Two will go to each because of their size."

Riza looked across at him, noticing how he wasn't necessarily talking to her in particular, just thinking out loud. From the way his hands gripped the steering wheel, the whites of his knuckles showing, and his expression, Riza knew he was as worried as she was. But he had been a detective for years. He was just better at hiding his concern.

Riza, on the other hand, wouldn't be much use anyway. She was in a fog of worry but unable to form any real thoughts or plans on how to find her son. She _wanted_ to help but no other thoughts were entering her mind at the minute other than her son was missing. He had essentially been kidnapped by his biological father whose intentions were not clear in the slightest. Roy had noticed this, that's why he was taking her home. Still, she appreciated his monologue because at least she was being kept in the loop. At least she could focus on his voice. She always did that when she felt stressed.

"I'll send Havoc to the park to cover that too because it's such a large area. I'd go myself but I don't want to leave you alone right now." His tone was all business as he drove, efficiently making his way through traffic without breaking a sweat. The man was a natural under high pressure situations. Generally, so was Riza, but when it came to her son she shut down.

"We _will_ find him. Matt couldn't have gotten far with him. Do you know where he lives?"

Riza shook her head. "No." Her voice was hoarse.

"That's okay. I'll send a photo of James out to the officers so they know who to look for. I don't suppose you have one of Matt?"

Riza was about to answer now when she remembered the picture she had given James. "I do."

"Okay, good. It will be useful to have one of each." Roy parked in the apartment's garage and swiftly exited the vehicle, a man on a mission. He waited at the back of the car for her to exit. When she joined his side he grabbed her hand tightly and squeezed. Riza barely felt it. The pair of them rode the lift up to her apartment.

* * *

This wasn't good.

Time was stretching on and the longer it took him to find James the more it wore down Riza. Every time his phone rang she flinched. He was currently directing the search from their apartment for the time being and Roy was being sincere when he said to Riza that he wouldn't rest until he found the boy.

Mrs. Henderson across the hall had popped her head in with tea and biscuits. When she noticed all the commotion Roy had explained the situation to her and without being asked she offered to come in and help, lending her support.

Her being there also allowed Roy to pop out for a moment. He had been in the middle of work when he left to meet with Riza at James' school. Armstrong had allowed it once Roy had informed her of the situation but requested he take his casework home with him so not to fall behind. So she wasn't totally heartless.

Mrs. Henderson confirmed it would be all right to leave her with Riza for a while so he could return to the office. Roy didn't want to leave her, but he was growing restless hanging around the apartment and waiting for the phone to ring for any updates. He needed to burn off some energy and this would kill two birds with one stone. Plus, if the situation became any worse – touch wood – he wouldn't have time to return to the office later tonight. It would also give him some time to think and run through some scenarios out loud he didn't want to do at home because they would scare Riza. He had been a cop too long to rule out the fact this may not have a happy ending, as much as the thought made him want to vomit.

Roy hadn't even bothered to park in the parking garage, he just pulled up out front. He'd placed his parking badge on the dashboard and exited the vehicle, enjoying the small perks that came with the job. Just as he was entering the building a police cruiser pulled up.

"Any news?"

"None," the officer replied. "The Mall is taking longer than we anticipated to search and there was nothing at the park. I've sent Fuery over to help."

The lift dinged as it opened its doors on the ground floor.

"Did you split up?" Roy asked. "If both of you went the same way you could have missed them exiting the area."

"We did, Sir." Officer Falman's face softened. "We covered everything."

Roy took a deep breath. He knew they would have, they were all good cops that's why Havoc had sent them over. It seemed the worry and pressure of finding James was wearing on him too without Roy realising it. It didn't help that the park had more than one exit. It had been a long shot to search there but Roy couldn't imagine Matt doing anything malicious with his biological son. It was likely he just took him out for the day. Taking the boy out of school without informing anyone certainly sounded like kidnapping to Roy – and in the eyes of the law – but James would have been willing to go.

Roy had noticed just how much James had opened up to the idea of meeting with Matt after that initial meeting. He knew there were questions he wanted to ask Matt without Roy there but was too shy to do so. The kid probably felt like he didn't want to upset or anger Roy, bless him. Not that he ever could. He was truly honoured to know such a brilliant child. He had told Riza as such too, attributing it to her upbringing. She had simply blushed and brushed the compliment off. Roy never let her forget it though.

"We'll find your son," Falman reassured him. "My team won't rest until we do." Roy swallowed and nodded, not having the heart or energy to correct the man. It certainly felt like it was his own flesh and blood that was missing.

"Thank you, Falman."

Riza's gaze snapped up from the floor when Roy entered the room and he smiled tightly at her. It was meant to instil confidence and reassure her but that fell flat when Roy saw her shoulders sag once more.

After thanking Mrs. Henderson, Roy took a seat next to Riza. He had noticed from the doorway just how much her hands were trembling. He pulled her to his side without a word, his wife leaning heavily against him. He tried to convey just how sorry he was this was all happening with his touch alone. Riza sniffed and Roy felt tears hit the back of his hand after he kissed the top of her head.

"Where is he, Roy?" she whimpered. The sound and her words tore at his chest. Oh, how he wanted to give her an answer. That was his job as a detective, to find people in situations like this, but he couldn't even do that. All he could do was sit on his backside and try and strategically search every area he could think of that James' liked to go.

When he saw that bastard Matt again, Roy swore he wouldn't go lightly on him.

" _So you_ will _leave them alone. Or you will have to answer to me."_

He would kill Matt for doing this to Riza.

"Mustang!" he heard Breda call from the hallway. "He's here!"

Riza stiffened in his arms then was out the room like a shot. Roy wasn't far behind. Riza was already on her knees, hugging her very surprised son tightly in the hallway. Roy felt all the tension leave him in one go, his knees going weak, as he spotted the boy who looked mildly confused.

"Mum?" he asked uncertainly.

"Oh my god, are you okay?" Riza's voice shook as she cried, taking the boy's face in her hands, thumbs running across his cheeks, before moving down his body as if to check and see if he was injured in any way.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied. When Roy placed a hand on his head, pulling him into a hug James got visibly more upset. "What's wrong? Why are you crying?"

"Where have you _been_?" Riza cried.

"With… Matt…" James replied, turning back to his biological father. His face was impassive at the end of the hall. The two officers who had joined them shifted, hands going to their pistols.

"You…" Riza looked up for the first time, noticing her ex. Roy watched as her face darkened, completely surprised by her next move. Riza jumped to her feet and launched herself at Matt. " _You bastard!_ " she shrieked, arms reaching for his face. Roy had no doubt she would gouge the man's eyes out if she made contact.

Roy reacted a second after her and grabbed her waist, his arm circling it to secure her against his body. What he didn't anticipate was the fight she put up. The woman had gone primal. The person who had essentially kidnapped her son was at the other end of the hall and she wanted revenge.

"Riza!" Roy cried, ducking one of her flailing arms. "I need you to calm down," he urged.

"Get _off_ me," she snarled, hands pulling at his forearm. Her nails bit into his skin painfully but Roy remained steady. Oh, he wanted to kill Matt, no doubt about it, but he wouldn't let Riza get her revenge like this.

"Stop!" Roy grabbed one arm and pinned it behind her back. Her other was free to move and there was not much more Roy could do about that except wince as she clawed at his skin. Instead, he leaned forwards so he could speak lowly into her ear. "You're scaring James," he told her. It was true, she was. The boy had tears running down his face as he watched his mother lose control like this. Hell, she was scaring _him_.

"Let go of me," she tried again, but the fight in her was weaker, the bite lessening in her voice. Her eyes continued to stare straight ahead, right at Matt, but Roy never took his eyes off of her.

"Riza, please, stop. Not here."

"He needs to pay! He took my boy!" Her shouts echoed throughout the hallway, banging loudly against the walls for all to hear.

"I know and he will. You can't do it, but I can." Her struggling eased and Roy let go of the arm he had pinned. Both gripped his forearm tightly, anchoring herself to him. Her body heaved as she tried to get her breath. "I'll take care of him."

"No," she replied petulantly, but there was no fight in her anymore.

" _Yes_ ," he urged. "Look, this is scaring James. Hell, you are scaring _me_. I need you to calm down."

"He took my boy," she whispered, legs beginning to shake with exhaustion.

"I know he did, he took my son too, but I won't let you lash out in anger like this. God knows I want to, but this wouldn't solve anything. You'd just hurt James."

Riza stiffened in his hold, her legs giving out beneath her.

Roy followed her to the ground to soften the blow. Her loud sobs filled the hallway. Roy turned her so she could cry into his chest. Wrapping his arms around her shoulders tightly his cold stare found Matt's. He would fucking deal with him all right. That promise still remained. This man still continued to do damage to Riza but no more. No fucking more. At least he had the decency to look slightly terrified. If it wouldn't have affected both Riza and James so Roy would have let her have at her ex. Matt would be a bloody pulp on the floor by now.

"Go inside with James. I'll deal with this. I promise."

Mrs. Henderson was quickly by her side and helped Riza to her feet. The sound of her sobs settled around him as he regarded Matt with an icy glare. As soon as Matt opened his mouth to talk, Roy interjected.

"Take him to the station. I'll deal with him in the morning."

Terror overtook Matt's face. "You can't do that. He's my son too! I have a right to see him"

"You took him from his school without consent from his legal guardian and without informing his mother or the school. In the eyes of the law that is seen as abducting a child."

"He's my son!" he shouted back, fury replacing his fear.

"Not legally. You have been absent for the boy's life for eleven years." Roy stalked closer to him slowly once Falman and Breda had subdued him, like a lion stalking its prey. "You offered no support during pregnancy, no support during childbirth, and no financial aid to provide for his care. You abandoned both the child and his mother without another thought." Roy was in front of him now. He couldn't help but get right up into Matt's face. "You are no more his father than a stranger on the street," Roy spat.

Without another word he turned on his heel, walking back to his family.

Mrs. Henderson had busied herself in the kitchen making another round of tea while Riza held James in her arms on the couch, cradling the upset boy against her body while rocking them both backwards and forwards. Her eyes were closed, face pulled tight as she tried not to cry.

Before Roy could join them he had work to do. He phoned the school and informed them James had been found. He called the officers searching the mall, calling off the search. Even Armstrong called him once word had got out the boy was safe. In a rare turn of events she told him not to worry about that case he had been working on before he left. He could deal with it whenever he returned to work, effectively giving him the option to take as much time with his family as possible.

Did hell just freeze over?

Havoc informed him he would take over and process Matt. After thanking his partner, Roy finally hung up the phone, itching to see to his family.

The two hadn't moved from the spot, despite the fact Roy had been making phone calls for the last half hour. Mrs. Henderson patted him on the arm with a sad smile when he returned to the room, excusing herself.

Roy strode over to Riza and James to take up a seat next to them and wrapped them in his arms.

"I'm so sorry," James mumbled as he cried softly.

"Don't apologise, bud," Roy reassured him. Of _course_ James would think this was his fault. He was his mother's son. "This wasn't your fault."

"I should've known better though. I thought it was weird but…" he trailed off, wiping his eyes and swallowing hard. "He told me he had told Mum and the school I was leaving. He _said_ it would be okay."

Roy felt a new spike of anger inside of him. Matt had lied and manipulated James in order to get his own way.

"He said he wanted to spend some time with me before I went to the dentist. He _said_ you had told him, Mum."

"It's okay, James," Roy soothed, feeling Riza stiffen underneath his hands. "Your Mum didn't tell him. I did." The boy's eyes glanced up to his. "He asked when he could see you again and I said you couldn't do it tomorrow because you had the dentist. He used that to his advantage." It made Matt sound like the bad guy, which wasn't Roy's intention to turn James away from his biological father, but it was the truth. He wouldn't hide that from him. The man had been a shitty Dad from day one. Roy wouldn't sugar coat it in order to justify Matt's actions. He couldn't. That would hurt Riza even more because it would appear as if Roy was taking Matt's side.

"I don't ever want to see him again," he muttered.

"You don't need to, I promise you. Not after what he did today."

James sighed and buried his face in his mother's chest. Riza's eye squeezed shut tighter, a few silent tears escaping. Roy rubbed her back soothingly in response, holding them both tightly.

* * *

 **SHOUT OUT TO PARALLEL CONVERSATIONS WITH THE ANIME UWU**

 **nothing against charlotte's web or anything i just needed a book name and that was the first that popped into my head for that age range**

 **and im sorry my hand slipped and wrote more angst WHOOPS**


	5. baby shark

**AN: im not even sorry and this is genuinely something that happened with my little cousin**

 **baby mia is such a delight to write (and may or may not be based entirely on my cousin who is the same age as her here [eye emoji])**

* * *

 _ **baby shark doo doo doo doo doo doo**_

 _ **baby shark |**_ _ **pinkfong**_

"Mo'!" Mia screamed in delight when the song ended, demanding he play it again. Roy groaned internally but smiled brightly to his fifteen month old as he rewound the video for the fifth time and that damn shark swam across the screen. He only did it because of how happy it made her.

"No…" James muttered quietly to himself from the opposite end of the room, but he was grinning. It thoroughly amused him to watch Mia so excited whenever she heard that song, but he didn't have to listen to the six hour uninterrupted version on YouTube during the day when Roy looked after her.

It _was_ cute the way her whole body shook, unable to contain her excitement at her favourite song, Roy had to admit. It was extremely adorable watching her mimic the actions from the song. Both parents had been stunned to watch her pick them up so quickly. Every action was perfectly performed as she smiled happily to herself, dancing along.

James, the only one in the house not beaten down by this song, sang along with his baby sister, mimicking the actions. When the song hit "daddy shark", Mia whirled around and stared at her father. "Duh!" she proclaimed, smacking her hands together enthusiastically. Her scrunched up face always cracked Roy up. She did the same to Riza for the "mummy shark" part.

As Roy watched James sing along with Mia he smiled. James was extremely protective of his little sister and always made time for her. Roy wasn't sure what to expect from the teenager. He was at that age where kids thought it wasn't "cool" to hang out with your family, but James never shied away from them. In fact, whenever he had free time at night or had no plans, he would sit in the living room with them and watch TV. Sometimes he would play on his Switch or read a book, but at least he was there with them rather than cooped up in his room.

"It's the end!" James proclaimed and both brother and sister clapped their hands together as the song signalled it was finished.

Mia, upon realising it was over, frowned and protested loudly, hurrying back over to her father. She did it again when she saw Roy turn the screen off.

"Baby shark is going to bed now," Roy stated, but Mia was having none of it. She grabbed the phone before he could move it, pulling against his hold. "Ah, ah, Mia," he warned. "You need to be careful." She always did this when the song finished. Even if it had been on for hours, she whined when it was turned off. She tugged again and Roy relented, interested to see what she would do. Mia gasped in wonder, tapping the phone with her thumbs, her brow furrowing when the screen didn't light up and the song didn't play.

"Give it to Dad," James told her. "He can work it for you."

Then she began to wander away with it.

"Mia," Roy warned her, his tone firmer. He stood and Mia toddled off with his device, looking over her shoulder to see if he was following behind her. Ending up in front of the couch, Mia threw the phone and it landed with a bounce on the cushion.

"Oh…" James commented, amusement in his voice. "Bad idea, Mia."

"Right, that's enough of that," Roy stated, retrieving his phone as her short arms tried to grab it.

She wailed once before her face scrunched up and she ran over to her big brother. Roy sighed. Of course, now _he_ was the bad guy.

James laughed at her. However, when she cuddled into her brother's knee, James scolded her gently. "You can't come running over for a hug when you know you have done something wrong." She wailed against his trouser leg and James rolled his eyes, lifting her onto his lap. Mia scrambled and buried her face in his neck to hide from Roy. "You can't throw things like that Mia, that's bad. How would you like it if I threw one of your toys and it broke?"

Suddenly, Roy was transported back to a time in the woods up north, where he had the same conversation with James. He smiled softly at the memory.

"Baby shark has gone to bed, okay?" James told her, pulling Mia away from his body, but to no avail. She just continued to cry as she clutched the collar of his t-shirt tightly.

"Maybe it will come out later," Roy offered. He was well versed in Mia's crying fits when baby shark was turned off. That piqued her interest however because Mia went quiet all of a sudden and turned to face her father. "But the sharks only come out to see good boys and girls, okay? So you have to be good until then."

Mia nodded and shimmied down her brother, plopping onto the floor. She walked to her ball pit and picked up another toy, her tantrum forgotten. The two men shared a look, sighing in relief as her attention had been diverted elsewhere.


	6. stand by me

**i know some of you asked for this one aaages ago so here we go! the last chapter was just a bit of fun while i worked on this so i hope you enjoy**

 **there will probably only be one more chapter after this one which i will have uploaded by the end of the week**

 **enjoy!**

* * *

 _ **just as long as you stand, stand by me**_

 _ **stand by me | ben e. king**_

"Ready, bud?"

James turned and grinned at Roy. He was currently standing at the front of the ballroom in the hotel both he and Jessica had chosen for their wedding. His mother approached also, a happy smile on her face, her eyes filled with unshed tears. She looked so proud of him and James had to swallow down the lump in his throat.

"Yeah," he breathed, excitement and anticipation coursing through him. He had been looking forward to this day for years and now that it was finally here, James could hardly believe it. Jessica had been with him forever and he was looking forward to beginning the next chapter of their lives, married and together in every way that mattered.

Mum pulled him into a hug, her hold fierce. James chuckled and returned the sentiment just as tightly. "Thanks, Mum. For everything." Her breath hitched and she pulled away, fanning at her face. She never really wore makeup but one of Dad's sisters had done the makeup of all the woman at the wedding.

"Now I'm going to cry!" she complained with a wobbly smile.

"You're allowed to cry today," James pointed out with a grin. "I won't accept anything less."

Mum laughed and pulled him close again. "I'm _so_ proud of you," she whispered, pulling back to kiss his cheek. "I love you."

"Love you too, Mum."

"Come here," Dad beckoned, opening his arms. James would have to get used to lots of hugs today it seemed. "Proud of you, bud," he stated, grip tightening on James as he spoke.

"Thanks Dad. Thank you both, for everything today."

His parents had paid for half of the wedding while Jessica's paid for the other half. Both he and Jessica hadn't been interested in a large wedding, which is why there were so little chairs in the ballroom. In the evening though, that was when more people were invited. Right now, only James and Jessica's close friends and family were present.

"It is an honour to do it for you both," Dad explained. "I'm just so happy to see you all grown up. Now you are getting _married_. We're so old, Riza." Dad grimaced.

"Speak for yourself," Mum replied dryly with a quiet chuckle while dabbing at her eyes. She smacked his chest with her hand lightly. "Come on, old man," she grinned. "Let's stop fussing and take our seats."

"One second." Dad reached for the pocket of James' suit and straightened the tissue in there. Looking down, James saw it had become rumpled in the hug fest they had just shared. "There. Perfect," Dad grinned.

The strings kicked in quietly and a hush fell over the room instantly. Mia walked in first holding a bouquet a flowers. Her smile was radiant and James grinned at his sister. On her arm was one of James' friends from work.

Jessica didn't have any brothers or sisters, so had opted to include Mia in the bridal party as a bridesmaid, which James knew his whole family really appreciated.

Jessica's maid of honour walked in next with Ben, James best man. Both he and James had grown up with Jessica, with Ben joining their small circle of friends two years afterwards. He had moved to Central with his parents from the east and that country drawl had never really left him. It reminded James of Havoc's accent. It was faint but it came out every now and then.

"Ready?" Ben asked quietly, joining James by his side. His best man grinned at James, happy for his old friend.

"Hell yeah, man."

James breath caught in his throat once Jessica joined his side before the ceremony began. Her eyes danced with excitement, showing him just how happy she really was. She grinned at him before turning her attention to the registrar who was conducting the ceremony but James couldn't look away from his fiancé. Her dress was incredible. The bodice was simple at the front, the fabric wrapping from the neckline to one spot on the left hand side. It twirled around to her back to a point, where it flowed open into the back of the skirt. The back of the bodice was like a corset, it had to be tied and tightened in order to keep the dress on. Little diamonds were dotted on the skirt, so small that they could barely be seen, but when they caught the light it added a little something extra to the design.

Her hair had been swept back from her face and collected at the back of her head where it was secured with a pin. The ends curled down, her hair coming to a spot just above the small of her back. Jessica always wore her hair in a ponytail so it didn't surprise him in the slightest that it was styled in a similar way too. It was just that what he had imagined was _nothing_ compared to the real thing. Even her little wispy hairs, the ones he loved to brush off her face, continued to fall across her pale skin. Whether that was intentional or her fiery red hair refused to be tamed just like always, James wasn't sure, but he loved it regardless.

In short, his bride was stunning. James could barely pay attention during the ceremony but it came to their vows and they faced each other, Jessica took his breath away once more. There were more than a few sounds of people blowing their noses as James and Jessica declared their love for each other in front of the most important people in their lives. Out the corner of his eye James spotted Dad taking a tissue from Mum and dabbing at his eyes.

The music that played them out of the room was almost drowned out by the sound of clapping and cheering. They were led to a waiting area outside the main ballroom where they both embraced, both ecstatic and unable to hide it any longer.

"Hello Mrs. Mustang," James murmured in her ear as they held each other, content in the brief silence. In a minute or so their guests would join them while the hotel reorganised the ballroom for the reception tonight. Then there would be the pictures so James wasn't sure the next time they would get a moment of peace together. Probably their first dance.

"I like the sound of that," Jessica giggled, kissing his cheek.

"I do too," he grinned.

The door behind them opened and the next two hours were filled with congratulations and taking pictures. It was a whirlwind of a day and by the time the first dance came around James could hardly believe the time.

As Ben E. King sang in the background James stared into Jessica's eyes and couldn't believe how lucky he was to have met her. When the strings kicked in after two minutes other couples joined the floor. Mum and Dad swayed together next to them, both whispering to each other. Dad held her close while Mum's arm was wrapped around the back of his neck, hand splayed across his shoulder. They were totally lost in their own little bubble and James grinned when he spotted them.

He had noticed they do that a lot, get lost in each other. James had never really been sure about true love. Families were supposed to share that with each other, but his real father had left both him and his mother without any attempt to make contact with them over the years. After that fiasco during school they had never seen Matt again and while James had been confused at first, now that he was older, he understood the situation and was glad Matt was out of his life. Whether the bastard had tried to intentionally hurt his mother or not, they still didn't know, but James wouldn't give the man another thought after that.

When he saw his mother and Roy… _That_ was true love. There was no doubt about it in his mind. Jessica had also commented on it, solidifying his theory.

"I hope we end up like them one day," Jessica sighed, her voice quiet as she lay her head on James' shoulder. His hold around her waist tightened.

"Who?"

"Your mother and father."

James pulled away and looked at her, noticing she was looking off to his left where Roy and his mother slow danced at the opposite end of the dancefloor. He only caught a glimpse of them through the other bodies swaying together.

"That's… not what I expected you to say," he chuckled. "You have so little faith in our relationship," he joked.

"You know what I _mean_ ," Jessica glared playfully. "I love you and have every faith, James Mustang. And I know you think about it too."

"You do?"

Jessica nodded. "I know they had a rough start but through everything they pulled through even stronger. I mean, touch wood nothing like that ever happens to us, thank you very much." Jessica tapped her head. "I admire the hell out of that."

"I do too." His eyes found his mother who pulled back to laugh at something Roy said, her head tilting back. Over the sound of the music he couldn't hear it but James saw her reply before kissing him. Roy grinned in response, his arms shifting around his wife's waist. "Seeing what they came from and where they are now I'm so happy for my mother. She gave up everything for me and I'm glad she's finally happy. She's much happier now with Roy than she was when I was growing up."

Jessica's brow creased as she looked at him. "You don't think she was unhappy because of you, do you?"

"I used to," James admitted. "Before, when I was too young to understand."

"Good," Jessica replied firmly. "Because even I knew that was never the case."

James chuckled. "No, she was never unhappy with me. I was spoiled and loved unconditionally, even by Roy when he came along. As long as he made my mother happy, he was all right in my book."

Jessica sighed and placed her head back on his shoulder. "I always liked him. He used to slip us sweets whenever I was round at your house and Riza said no." James could hear the grin in her tone and he laughed.

"He did. He was a bad influence."

"Do you remember when he was trying to teach her to rollerblade a couple of years ago in the summer and she broke her wrist?"

"I _do_. She was pissed."

"Just like when we were up north and he hit in right in the centre of the face with a snowball. Well, ice ball was more like it." They ended up giggling together for a few minutes, sharing little anecdotes of their lives together. "I've always loved your family, James. I'm so happy to finally be a part of it."

James captured her lips with his, feeling an irresistible urge to kiss her there and then. God, he loved this woman. "You always have been a part of it," he murmured, voice dropping low as his love for his wife coiled in his chest and spread throughout his whole body. It warmed it, like the way her smile did after he'd had a long day at the office.

"Really?" Jessica asked, gazing up into his eyes.

"Of course," he smiled softly. "Mum has always considered you part of the family even when you were a kid."

Jessica blushed prettily and James wanted to kiss her again.

"I… I didn't know that. Same goes for you, by the way. My mother always liked you as a kid. Probably because you were so polite."

James chuckled. They swayed in silence for a moment, simply basking in their love for one another and enjoying the slow melody being played. While his love for Jessica swelled in his chest, James voiced words he had been thinking about ever since she joined him at the altar.

"I'm so happy you are here with me. Not just as my wife, but as my best friend. I honestly feel like the sky could fall down on top of me right now but I wouldn't worry or care, so long as you are here by my side."

"You're such a drama queen," Jessica grinned, pressing her forehead against his.

"You love it though."

"I do. I really do."

* * *

"I'm so proud of him," Riza stated, tears in her eyes as she watched her son dance with his new wife. She sniffed and wiped her eyes. The makeup was long gone. After the ceremony that afternoon she had been a mess. Jessica had touched it up for her in the bathroom, bless her heart, so that it was okay while pictures were being taken, but after that Riza just removed it completely. There were too many happy tears to be shed today for her to wear makeup. It just wasn't functional.

An arm snaked around her shoulder, the man in the chair next to her also observing his adoptive son dance. "So am I. He's turned into a fine young man, thanks to you."

Riza smiled at him, her lips quivering as a tear fell. " _And_ you."

Roy reached over and brushed her tear away, his thumb lingering on her cheek. "I may have helped a little bit but he was already amazing before I met him." His palm moved to cup her cheek and he kissed her tenderly. "That was all you."

Riza tilted her head and rested it on her husband's shoulder as they returned to watch the dancefloor. "I'm just glad he is happy."

Roy's hand tensed on her shoulder, but loosened shortly afterwards. "You were worried about it, weren't you?"

Roy always managed to see through her. Riza nodded after a moment. "I just… I don't know. I mean, I always worry, about you, Mia, and James."

"What do you worry about?" Roy asked, lifting her head and turning to face her.

"Everything," she replied honestly. "I just want you all to be happy and cared for."

"We always are. Riza, listen to me." He commanded her attention softly and Riza was unable to resist it. She looked into his eyes, seeing nothing but love and reassurance. "There's nothing to worry about. You're an amazing mother to those kids and that is _never_ going to change." Roy took a deep breath, his expression softening. "You're not your father." Dread pooled in her stomach. "You never will be so stop trying so hard not to be like him."

"I just…" she whispered, trailing off. Riza closed her eyes. She didn't want to get into this today but it had been piling up for months on the lead up to the wedding. She knew she had been pushy and probably tried too hard with the wedding arrangements, but she just wanted everything to be perfect for James. He deserved to have the best day and she was determined to give it to him.

Just like she always had when he was a kid.

"What, love?" His hand found her cheek again and Riza leaned into his touch.

"I just want to be a good mother, you know."

Roy pulled her unexpectedly into a fierce embrace. His chin found the top of her head and his words were equally as fierce as his hold. "You have _always_ been a good mother. Don't you _ever_ doubt that."

"I hear his voice now and again…"A shiver ran down her spine, the memory of her father cursing her and hurling abuse just because she was pregnant. "Like it has come back to haunt me –"

"That man was a bastard for what he did to you, do you hear me? Are you a bastard?"

"… No."

"No, you are most definitely not. Have you done everything for our kids? Yes. Did you give up everything for James when he was growing up, even your own happiness? Yes. Have you ever laid a hand on them? No. You are nothing like him."

She was taken aback by Roy's tone, not expecting the protectiveness he felt towards her regarding her father to be projected into it. She relaxed slightly into his hold. The next time he spoke, his voice was much softer, the sound rumbling through his chest. Riza closed her eyes and focussed on that to calm her anxiety.

"I know that will never go away but he can't hurt you anymore. He's gone for good. No matter what your father said about you being a mother, you are the best one I have _ever_ seen and I'm truly honoured to raise my children with you."

"Roy…" She was touched. Tears found their way to her eyes once more.

"I know you like to hear things just to confirm they are true." He was right. It was difficult for her to believe in something unless they told her directly and honestly. Roy had learned that early on. He knew that her mind and anxiety would often tell her people's words weren't true. "So believe me when I say that we _all_ love and appreciate everything you've ever done of us. You are perfect." In Roy's last sentence each word was punctuated by a kiss to her nose and Riza giggled through her tears, despite the mood of the situation.

Riza would stop being afraid. She was determined to, always had been, but it was easier said than done. Her upbringing had left her riddled with anxiety in certain social situations that dealt with emotions. Her father was one to thank for that. The man had beaten her and constantly put her down, hurling abuse when she even did the slightest thing wrong. She hated him so much that it burned in her chest.

She would never become him. That was something she had always vowed to herself. So, Riza had put others in front of herself as a way to gain friendship and appreciation. It wasn't the healthiest way, but her mind had been trained to think that by doing everything for someone, they would leave her be. It had worked with her father. She had looked after him in his drunken stupor. She had cleaned up his vomit so that he wouldn't throw a fit about the state she had left the house in when he regained consciousness.

Riza did it out of fear, at first. Then her friends and family had taught her to do it out of love.

"Thank you," she breathed, finally relaxing and feeling lightly better about herself. "For everything. Promise me one thing?"

"Anything."

"If this happens again, please tell me how much of an idiot I am."

Roy chuckled, grip on her tightening as he kissed the top of her head. "You're not an idiot. It's understandable to feel that way. Especially after… Well, especially in your situation." He had purposefully avoided mentioning her childhood in order to move past it and Riza was grateful. "Whenever you feel this way again, talk to me and I'll be there. I won't ever leave your side, not so long as you need me."

"Mum? Are you okay?" Mia asked from her right.

Her daughter stood next to Riza's chair, a worried look on her face. Even Andrew, Rebecca and Jean's son, looked slightly concerned.

"I'm perfect, honey, thanks to your Dad." Mia relaxed then smiled brightly.

"Okay. Good! Dad, I was wondering, could I could dance with you?" Her eyes lit up and she bounced excitedly. "Can we do the one where I stand on your feet?"

Roy chuckled and shifted his arms from around Riza. "I don't know, you will have to ask your date if I can borrow you for a few minutes."

Riza rolled her eyes while Andrew blushed furiously and Mia mirrored her mother. "Dad," she whined irritably, but there was a hint of a blush on her cheeks as well.

Roy laughed loudly. "I'm just messing with you. Of course we can, bear. Let's go."

"Okay!"

Roy kissed Riza's forehead and smiled at her, silently asking her with his eyes if she will be all right. Riza nodded and motioned for them to go and enjoy themselves. The heavy weight that had been resting on her mind for the past few weeks had lessened now she had talked it through with Roy. One day she would learn to do that more often. So she grinned and chuckled at the pair of them as they danced, Mia standing on Roy's feet. He winced more often than not. Mia was not a heavy child, but she was fourteen now and was tall for her age, all arms and legs.

"Aunt Riza?" Andrew asked from her right.

"Yes, Andrew?"

"I was wondering… Um… How – How do you know when you… like someone?" Andrew blushed heavily once more, stuttering through his sentence nervously. Riza smiled knowingly. She always had an inkling the boy liked her daughter. Riza was also honoured he had come to her about this, rather than anyone else.

"Well Andrew, it all depends on the person." Riza looked back towards Roy as he grimaced once more but never complained, grinning when his daughter beamed up at him. "When you look at them you know that you want to be with them forever. For you and Mia, it is early days at the minute, but you really feel like that person is "The One" and that you want to spend the rest of your life with them." Andrew blushed again when Riza mentioned her daughter's name. "It feels like coming home after a bad day and knowing that everything is all right now because you get to see them."

"Wow," Andrew replied in awe. "Is that what you feel for Uncle Roy?"

Riza grinned. "Oh yes. Without a doubt."

"Okay," he replied thoughtfully, eyes cast down to the floor as he mulled over Riza's words. When he lifted his head, his eyes held a sparkle and he looked surer of himself than he had before. "Okay! Thanks, Aunt Riza."

"No problem, kiddo. No go." Riza nodded her head towards her husband. "Go and ask Mia to dance. I'm sure she will love it."

* * *

 **a little bit of angst, a little bit of fluff, a** **little bit of jessica, here i am, a little bit of you makes me your man~**


	7. future looks good

**ok SIKE i had actually finished this chapter and hadn't even realised (it just needed edited) so here you go! two in one night!**

* * *

 _ **he said that you are, you are the future, and the future looks good**_

 _ **future looks good | onerepublic**_

"We'll be back tomorrow around noon," Riza reminded him for what felt like the millionth time. "Call me if you need anything, okay?" Roy bit his tongue because he knew this was more for her benefit rather than his.

This was his first time looking after Mia by himself for an extended period of time. After the birth of her second child Riza quit her job to stay at home and raise her. She had mentioned to Roy before about how she wasn't interested in the job itself anymore and was looking for a change. This was just a very convenient time to have another child. Roy didn't mind either. As long as Riza was happy then that was what mattered to him. They could afford it financially so they thought, why not?

So she had always been there. He had looked after Mia by himself millions of times before but Riza was just worried because she wouldn't be there overnight.

And now Mia could walk and get her hands on things that she probably shouldn't.

Of course he was nervous.

"I'll be fine, love," Roy interrupted, placing his hands gently on her upper arms. He drew her close, kissing her forehead goodbye. It was a habit he had picked up and didn't plan on stopping. "She's my kid too," he teased. Riza's lips formed a thin line, not appreciating his joke. "I've done it before. Go and enjoy your night out with Catalina. We'll be fine."

They were going out for a belated birthday celebration for Catalina. A day in Central then a night out on the town is what the birthday girl had ordered and Riza didn't want to say no to her, despite not wanting to be apart from Mia for so long. This would be the first time she had been. Roy guessed Catalina was desperate to get away from Andrew. She loved the kid for sure, but Roy knew how tiring parenthood could be.

"I'll phone you in the morning." That sounded more like a warning than a reassurance.

"We'll be _fine_. Go and enjoy yourself and don't worry."

She didn't seem convinced – he was _hurt_ that she didn't seem to have that much faith in him. When he told Riza that, she simply raised an eyebrow derisively.

"It's not Mia I'm worried about."

And so, father and daughter were left alone in their house. James was staying over at Jessica's after school so it truly would just be the two of them for the next twenty four hours.

"Buh," Mia stated, pointing to a small ball on the ground. God, she loved anything that was circular. They were all "buh", her word for ball.

"That's right," Roy stated, picking up the ball. "It's a ball. Ta," he added as he handed the ball over.

"Buh!" she cried happily, clapping her hands together, the soft ball hitting against her palm. She toddled off, ball in hand, to find something else to catch her attention. For her first birthday Roy had bought her a ball pit which she _loved_. Mia truly didn't know what to do with herself when she saw all those balls in the one place. Her body shook with excitement and she squealed in delight.

She found her bear blanket and picked it up, dragging it along the floor behind her in the opposite hand. Roy smiled fondly at his daughter as she wandered around the room, undecided about what to play with.

Raising Mia was a relatively easy job so far. They had heard the horror stories that Havoc and Catalina had experienced with Andrew, but – touch wood – none of that had come their way. She was a happy kid. Always on the go and could throw a tantrum every now and then, but it was only for a couple of minutes at best. Just mention baby shark to her or hand her a ball and she would be right as rain in an instant.

By the time lunch time rolled around Roy was feeling pretty confident and happy about his morning with Mia. She had her mid-morning nap while he took her out for a walk around the neighbourhood. There had been no drama and only a small amount of tears when he placed her in the pram. Armed with a ball from her ball pit, Roy offered it to her while he strapped her in and her cries stopped like he had flipped a switch. A large grin appeared on her face instead, showing off her teeth.

"What would you like for lunch today Mia?" he asked, perusing the cupboards in their kitchen. There were her carrot puffs – like cheese puffs but tasted awful – that she loved, pots of custard, apple flavoured biscotti that Roy had yet to wrap his head around, and, a rare treat for Mia (or really whenever Roy or James looked after her) a small bar of chocolate.

Riza was very anti-chocolate regarding Mia. "She's not getting any chocolate!" she would state firmly, yet happily gave her Nutella spread on toast. That meal was saved for days where she was feeling slightly stressed because their eighteen month old daughter was being picky and frustrating by not eating anything else.

After peering into the cupboard, crouched down exactly like her father even though she was already at the perfect height for looking inside – Roy knew because she turned round to look at his legs and checked before she lowered her body – Mia gasped excitedly, finger pointing towards the pot of custard. Clasping her hands to her chest she backed up into her father who was crouched behind her, looking up expectantly.

"Would you like some custard?" he asked her, pulling the pot from the shelf. Mia's enthusiastic nod and excited grin was answer enough. "Custard it is!"

Roy loved this age. She had a firm grasp on basic words and could understand questions she was asked. Mia could tell you what she wanted with a nod or a shake of her head. For the last six months her only real "word" was "buh", ball. Recently she had grasped others, such as "doh" for door, "va" for van, "ka", for car, and "ma" for man. The latter she used whenever she saw Spider Man. James' school bag was black and grey checked, but here were small images of Spider Man dotted around the checks. It was his "I'm old enough that I want to look cool but I still love Spider Man" bag. Plus, Vans bags were all the rage right now so he was more than happy to oblige to embracing his childhood superhero again.

"Do you want to sit in your high chair?" Roy asked. Mia considered the question while eyeing the piece of furniture. She shook her head gently, as if afraid her father would put her in it anyway. "Okay, come on then, let's head back to the living room and eat your lunch."

Mia grinned and toddled through, Roy following dutifully behind her. She hurried into the centre of the room, picking up her orange ball while saying "buh".

"That's right, that's a ball." Roy sat in what Riza and James had dubbed "Dad's chair" because he always sat in it. Roy had huffed, muttering about how it was just more comfortable to him. That chair had been with him since he bought his apartment and he had become fond of the grey fabric piece. "It didn't match the décor" Riza would state when half-threatening to throw it out. How could grey not match the other shade of grey they had in the room?

Plus, that chair was the only piece of furniture he had saved from his time in his apartment. It held memories. He couldn't get rid of it.

Mia ate without fuss and the rest of their afternoon was spent playing with her toys. Roy tried to juggle keeping her entertained and making her dinner. That was an experience, especially when Riza called, cutting off baby shark for Mia. His daughter protested loudly and Riza chuckled down the line.

"Having fun?" she asked dryly.

Roy winced as Mia's cry pierced his ear. "Mia!" he scolded. She pouted in response, bottom lip sticking out like she was gearing up to cry. "You turned off a certain shark that she was dancing with."

"Oh, god forbid that happen," Riza remarked. "It's your own fault for sticking on that six hour loop on YouTube."

"It kept her happy so I was happy." Roy glanced over to his daughter who looked ready to explode into tears. "Speaking of, she's not right now." Roy lowered the phone to Mia, putting it on speakerphone. "Mia, its Mummy. Say hello."

Mia blinked up at Roy before peering into the phone, seeing the picture Roy had saved next to Riza's contact.

"Hello, sweetheart," Riza greeted through the phone. Mia's face lit up, her toothy grin spreading across her face. She garbled some nonsense while Roy sighed in relief. Riza laughed. "Hello to you too. Are you having fun?"

"Ya," Mia nodded enthusiastically. Roy slipped away and continued dishing up Mia's food while she was distracted.

"Are you being good for Daddy?"

"Da!" Mia shouted, clapping her hands together happily. She grinned over at Roy who waved back to her.

"I'll take that as a yes. What are you doing now?"

Mia babbled once more, only stopping once Roy placed the plate of food down in front of her. Mashed potatoes, chicken nuggets, and little cut up bits of cucumber.

"Daddy just made Mia's dinner. She's eating it now."

"We both know that is a two hand job, so I will leave you to it." Roy heard the amusement in her voice. Mia was prone to eating her food but also smearing it all over her high chair if left to do so. Roy knew it was a bad idea to let her play with Andrew's play-doh. Now she thought mashed potato and play-do were the same thing. Roy grabbed her wrist gently before she could dive her hands into it.

"No, Mia, that's for eating, not playing." She pouted but when Roy offered her a spoonful of potato she ate it eagerly. He only just now wondered – with great dismay – if this was teaching her to eat yellow play-doh. Roy grimaced. He hoped not.

"I have to go, Roy. Rebecca is _finally_ ready. It only took her half an hour." Roy chuckled. Riza never did like to hang around when they were due to go out anywhere.

"Okay. Have fun."

"We will. I love you."

"We love you too, Riza."

"Love you, Mia."

Mia grinned again, showing her potato covered teeth.

"She says goodbye," Roy translated.

"Bye!" she shouted loudly, waving at Riza's picture.

Roy love that smile. There was only two teeth on the bottom of her mouth but all the teeth at the top had come through by now. When she grinned like this and showed them all _that_ was Roy's favourite smile.

The call disconnected and the two were left alone once more.

Roy was exhausted by the time Mia was down at seven o'clock. He picked up the baby monitor and trudged back down the stairs, but he knew it wouldn't be for too long. He was ready for his bed now. Mia was a tiring toddler. He was asleep by ten o'clock, passed out on the couch. He was woken up by the television at two am and Roy groaned, his back stiff from sleeping in his chair. Yes, it was his favourite, but it was incredibly uncomfortable to sleep on.

By the time Riza arrived home the next afternoon, both he and Mia were spent. Roy had taken her to the park that morning and the pair had ran around playing with a ball and went on the swings. Mia screeched "mo'!" as she swung, wanting to go higher and higher. Roy was reluctant to do so, but he indulged his daughter slightly. The baby swings were secure, there was no way she would fall out, he was sure. Her laugh had been music to his ears and truthfully he didn't want it to stop.

When she had gone for her mid-morning nap Roy had lay down on the sofa next to her and had dozed off, his arms curled protectively against his daughter. She was against the back of the couch while he lay towards the edge.

Mia squirming in her sleep was what woke him and he sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning tiredly. Glancing at his watch, he noticed with surprise he had slept for about an hour.

"Did you guys have fun?" Riza asked softly, a grin on her face. She sat on the couch opposite, a book in her hands. Judging by her position she had been here for a while.

"Hey," Roy greeted sleepily. Riza stood with a chuckle and kissed him, something he readily accepted. "We did, yes. I knew she was exhausting but I suppose it was my own fault for taking her to the park this morning."

Riza grinned, her look knowing. "A rookie mistake. What was it this time? The slide? That hill can be murder to walk up umpteen times."

Roy shook his head. "The swings."

Riza chuckled. "She loves them."

"Perhaps we should get one for the garden if she loves it so much? It would save a journey to the park."

Riza paused, looking thoughtful. "That's not a terrible idea. Her birthday is coming up after all."

"There we go," Roy grinned sleepily. "Present sorted." Riza sat next to him, peering around to look at Mia who was still out of it. Her little cheeks were red, the tell-tale sign of teething, something she'd had bother with earlier in the morning. "How was your night?"

"Really great," Riza replied honestly, sounding surprised.

"Why do you sound surprised?" Roy asked.

She shrugged. "I don't know. I think I just expected to not enjoy it so much. I thought I would be worrying too much about Mia."

"So you forgot about your child." Roy tutted jokingly. "Terrible."

Riza elbowed his side playfully while Roy laughed softly and wrapped an arm around her shoulder, drawing her against him. " _No_ , I just thought I was past all that going out stuff. Turns out I was wrong."

"So I may be required for more babysitting duties?" he asked cheekily, his expression conveying that.

"You don't babysit your own kid, Roy," Riza deadpanned.

"I know," he sighed dramatically. "I've got to put up with her twenty four seven instead." Riza's elbow this time wasn't playful in the slightest. He supposed he deserved that, he grinned. Riza knew he adored that kid and if he had his own way he would be with her twenty four seven.

Mia stirred, eyes opening as she woke from her nap. Roy lifted her up, cooing at her gently as she fought off sleep. For a minute or two her eyes drooped closed and she placed her head against Roy's shoulder, hands curling around the back of his neck. He grinned at Riza who made a quiet "aw" sound. Mia really was the cutest.

He would enjoy this small moment where she clung to him like this because in a few minutes time she would be off again. Not that Roy minded at all. All too soon she would be going to school and that terrified him. His little girl was growing up so fast already.

Riza placed a hand on Mia's back, it coming to rest atop his own and she smiled softly at him.

Yeah, the future might terrify him slightly, but in a good way.

Besides, with his two kids and Riza by his side, the future looked _really_ good.

* * *

 **there we have it! thank you to everyone who continued with this story even after the main one finished. i hope you enjoyed the further insight into this world as much as i did writing it. i'm sad to be finally finished with it but all good things must come to an end after all! now i want to go back and read let you love me ;_; i really love this world**

 **thank you again! much love!**


	8. hello my love

**AN :okay, my b, i forgot about a chapter for jessica and james' kid D: thank you IxiaLiliana for reminding me! .**

 **i hope this makes up for it...**

 **shoutout to waddiwasiwitch and tasia for help with the kid names**

* * *

' _ **cause your love is all i ever wanted, set my heart on fire, i needed something**_

 _ **this is all i wanted to be, you and i**_

 _ **hello my love**_ _ **westlife**_

"Oh my god," Riza whispered. Roy watched as a hand rose to her mouth in shock and he was instantly alert, listening intently, and straining to hear what was being said on the other side of the phone. If it caused this much of a reaction from Riza it must have been something big.

"Riza?" he asked uncertainly after she was silent for a few moments.

What Roy didn't expect was Riza waving her hand at him irritably, signalling him to be quiet. "Okay. We'll be there as soon as possible." She hung up the phone and sprung from the armchair.

"Riza?" Roy asked worriedly. This behaviour was most unlike her. Uncertainty and dread pooled in his stomach. She paused in the doorway, as if remembering Roy was in the room with her. A slow smile spread across her face and he noticed her eyes were wet. "What's wrong?" he asked, rising from his chair.

She shook her head. "Nothing's wrong," she replied, appearing to be in a daze. Her voice wavered and Roy's dread abated slightly when Riza took a deep breath and grinned. "Are you ready to meet your grandson?"

Roy blinked.

His _what_?

Riza's tears fell as she smiled, pulling him into a tight hug.

"My what?" Roy replied stupidly. He had heard Riza's words just fine but his brain refused to comprehend them.

"You're a grandfather, Roy," Riza grinned against his shoulder.

"I… Jessica… The baby… _Now_?"

Riza laughed, kissing him. "Yes, now. That was James on the phone. Jessica delivered the baby an hour ago. A beautiful and healthy baby boy."

"Oh my god… Oh my _god_!"

Roy lifted a laughing Riza off her feet and spun her around in the middle of their living room. He didn't care that Mia was (supposed to be) asleep. It was almost midnight and she had gone up to bed around ten however they were no doubt making enough noise to wake her up.

"We're grandparents," Roy said softly after placing Riza back on her feet. He smiled tenderly at her, feeling his love for this woman grow exponentially. She had welcomed him into her family which now had a brand-new member. Roy was aching to meet him already.

"We are," Riza confirmed.

"Are we going to the hospital now?" Riza laughed at the excitement in his tone. She kissed his nose.

"Of course we are."

"I'll go and wake Mia!"

Roy all but sprinted up the staircase, the sound of Riza's amusement following him. He knocked on Mia's bedroom door but received no answer. Half the time when he checked in on her he caught sight of her phone screen shining through her duvet cover. Roy had half a mind to scold her, but ultimately decided against it. The seventeen-year-old would quickly come to learn that she needed her sleep. She was usually very good during the week, it mostly only happened at the weekend, so he let it slide.

"Mia?" he whispered quietly. No answer. Roy creeped in and noticed she was, in fact, asleep, for a change. Her dark hair was loose in its ponytail, little hairs sticking up in places where it had been moving against her pillow. Smiling down at his daughter he perched on the edge of her bed so not to scare her when she woke. "Mia?" he tried again. She stirred and her eyes opened blearily before promptly shutting again. Her only response was a grunt that made Roy chuckle. After a while he eventually coaxed her awake.

"Dad?" she whined tiredly. "What is it?"

"James has been on the phone."

"Uh hu," Mia replied, not paying attention and curling back in on herself.

"Jessica had her baby."

Mia was silent and she sighed quietly. Then, comically, her eyes shot open despite the fact she was still fighting sleep. " _What_?" she screeched, voice cracking.

Roy nodded excitedly. "You're an Aunt!" he cried. Mia squealed and threw her arms around his neck while Roy laughed. "Do you want to go and meet him?"

"Him?" Mia asked in wonder.

Roy nodded enthusiastically. "As soon as you're ready we can go."

"Okay! Give me five minutes."

Roy kissed her forehead before closing the door behind him. Adrenaline and excitement coursed through him and he hopped down the last two steps in an attempt to exert some of that energy. Riza raised an amused eyebrow at his choice of descent. Roy simply grinned in response. True to her word, Mia was dressed and down the stairs in five minutes but Roy was still hopping from foot to foot impatiently.

"Calm down, ants in your pants," Riza admonished, amused. How she could be so calm and collected, Roy didn't know. Currently Riza was leaning against the wall in the main hallway, her ankles crossed casually. Like Roy, she had been to restless to sit and wait for Mia.

"Ready?" Roy asked Mia, ignoring Riza's comment. He was excited to meet his grandkid. So, sue him.

"Ready!" Mia announced brightly.

It took them twenty minutes to reach the hospital. A nurse escorted them to Jessica's room.

"Jessica?" the nurse called softly. "Your visitors are here if you are up for it?"

"Of course," she replied and Roy saw her smile at the trio as they stood outside the door.

Roy's gaze was instantly drawn to James who was holding his new-born son in his arms, lightly bouncing the baby up and down. Roy was instantly teleported back to seventeen years ago when Mia had been born. Tears sprung into his eyes.

"Hey guys," Jessica greeted tiredly.

"Hello, Jessica," Riza greeted, walking over to her daughter-in-law. "How are you doing?"

"I'm all right. Just tired."

"Welcome to the next fifteen years of your life," Riza chuckled with a wink. She gasped as she laid her eyes on her grandson. "Oh, Jessica, James," she whispered, looking at the new parents. "He's beautiful." Roy was still stuck in place, unable to tear his eyes away from the baby. He snuffled in his sleep, tiny mouth opening in a yawn. Roy gasped. He barely noticed that James had transferred his son – Roy's _grandson_ – over to Riza. Roy couldn't take his eyes off the kid.

"Would you like to hold him?" Riza asked with a knowing smile. Roy felt a tear track down his cheek but made no move to wipe it away.

Rendered mute by his grandson, Roy nodded. It was so unlike him to become speechless but this was his _grandson_. For the last nine months they had known he was coming, obviously, but now he was _here_. In Riza's arms. This was exactly like when Mia had been born.

The baby stirred in Roy's arms as he shifted from Riza to him. Roy instantly fell in love. He was so perfect. There was a small tuft of red hair atop his head, the tips of it lighter than at the roots. Long eyelashes fell across his tiny cheeks and his eyebrows there a shade lighter than Jessica's, but still red, like his mother's.

"He's beautiful," Roy whispered, bouncing his grandson lightly as he shifted once more. "Do you have a name?"

James and Jessica looked at each other. "We like the name Jeremy."

* * *

"Come _on_ , Granddad!" Jeremy called, exasperated.

Roy huffed quietly to himself. "I'm coming!" he replied, panting as he walked up the slope which was currently covered in snow. His fitness had taken a turn in recent years and it frustrated Roy no end. Being sixty-two was no joke when trying to hike up a snow-covered mountain. Also, trying to keep up with his twelve-year-old grandson was a feat. Like the boy's father, Jeremy was a ball of energy that could not be tamed. It didn't help that the snow was hindering his progress and his knee was acting up again. His shoulder ached in this cold but Roy grinned and bore it for his family's sake.

Breathing heavily, Roy finally made it to the top of the hill. They were high above the trees now and the view was spectacular. Roy remembered walking up here with James years ago. It was nice to know the view hadn't changed one bit.

Riza arrived next, breathing heavily as well. She rested her hands on her hips as she tried to catch her breath while gazing out across the mountains. James and Jessica brought up the rear, seven-year-old Jake in between them, one parent each holding a hand of their youngest son. Ten-year-old Josh re-joined the path shortly before the summit, having wandered off to run in the forest and dart in between the trees.

"We did it!" Jake called excitedly, swinging in James and Jessica's hands.

"Wow!" Josh hasped in wonder as he looked out at the view. "This is awesome! I can see the whole mountain from here!"

"Is this the same place you brought Dad when he was young?" Jeremy asked, neck craning to look up at his grandfather.

Roy nodded. "Brought him to this very spot."

"It hasn't changed at all, has it?" James grinned.

"Nope," Riza replied. She made her way over to Roy, grasping his hand tightly.

"Okay, group photo time!" James announced, whipping out his phone.

"Just give us a second," Riza replied. "I don't want to look exhausted in any photos."

"Okay!" James replied, turning to wrangle his three boys into some kind of order.

Roy thought it was hilarious both he and Jessica had continued with the "J" theme while naming their children. Jeremy was very athletic and excelled in most sports he took part in. Roy often joked Jeremy got that from him, which caused Riza to roll her eyes, but grin. In truth, he took after Jessica. He was very strong minded and took charge of almost every situation. He had often bossed them all about, especially when it came to playing board games in the lodge. Jeremy liked to maintain order, much to Roy and Riza's amusement and James and Jessica's dismay. There was a concern that Jeremy's brothers wouldn't be happy with such a strong leadership, but in all honesty, they looked up to their big brother and would follow anywhere Jeremy led them. In return, Jeremy was very protective of them both.

Josh was more into his books and art, like James was as a child. Roy remembered the boy approaching him with a very serious look on his face when he was three and hopping into Roy's lap, pressing a book into his hands. "Read," he had commanded and ever since then, the boy had been hooked. Roy had bought him a set of books from an old fantasy series he had read when he was a kid and Josh was besotted with them. It made Roy feel proud that he could share a big part of his childhood with his grandson. Josh would grow up reading about Harry Potter like he had and Roy couldn't be happier.

Jake was a mix of both. He would join in with whatever held his interest in the moment. He leaned more towards reading and colouring with Josh, but if Jeremy asked for someone to help him practice, Jake was always eager to join in. Josh would eventually make his way over to their game and the three would play together.

It warmed Roy's heart to see them get on so well. That was all he had ever wanted, to see them happy and healthy. His wish had come true.

"Hey, there's Aunt Mia!" James called, waving to his younger sister.

"Sorry we are late," she panted. " _Somebody_ didn't want to sit still while we put her shoes on," she looked pointedly at the four-year-old sitting atop her father's shoulders. Lilly giggled to herself, wiggling her feet. Geoff - Mia's husband – winced as the heel of his daughter's boot caught him in the shoulder.

"Get in here, we're taking photos!" James called.

Mia rolled her eyes. James was the photographer of the family, for sure, and made sure to bring out the camera at every family gathering. It reminded Roy very much of Maes and he grinned. Hughes had gotten even worse now he was a grandfather. If that was even possible.

As the eight of them organised themselves and took silly photos, Roy and Riza looked on fondly.

"We did well, didn't we?" Roy asked his wife.

She turned to look at him, hands hooking onto his arm. She grinned, nodding. Her short hair was almost all grey now. There were only a few strands of blonde streaked through it and Roy found himself missing her long hair once more. Oh, how he had loved to run his hands through it. His hair was greying too, but he was lucky to sport the salt and pepper look rather than a full head of grey hair. In his old age, Roy had opted to keep it slicked back permanently. He had no time or patience these days for hair falling over his eyes. Plus, in order to keep an eye on four excitable grandchildren he didn't need anything obscuring his vision. A few strands escaped more often than not but Roy allowed it because it gave Riza the excuse to brush them out of his face

Riza's eyes crinkled at the edges as she smiled. "We did really well."

"We have had some life," Roy commented as he watched a mischievous look appear in Jeremy's eyes. Just what exactly was that young man up to? "I mean, we went through _a lot_."

"We did."

"And I know at times I wasn't… great, especially at the start, but I'm so lucky to have fallen in love with you. I'm so lucky you gave me that chance. Thank you."

Riza smiled, squeezing his bicep. "You gave me that chance too, remember?"

"Yeah, but you could have gone with anyone. You could have saved yourself the heartache I brought upon you. I often wondered if I was worth it, if I was enough."

Riza rolled her eyes. "Stop being so dramatic. I chose you because I loved you. Life taught me that it's painful and often unfair. However, if you work at something you will be rewarded." Like she had been with James. Like the pair of them had experienced when their relationship finally came to fruition. Roy grinned.

"Equivalent exchange?" Roy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Something like that," Riza replied vaguely. Perhaps they had been watching too many documentaries on old style medicine and science from hundreds of years ago.

"I suppose you're right," Roy sighed. After the amount of work they put in to get to this point, especially since they first met, this was more than enough of a reward.

"I'm always right."

"Of course you are, dear."

"Back then, all I ever wanted was you." Riza's smile changed and Roy wanted to kiss her there and then. They were interrupted by a squeal of laughter from Lilly, who, still on her father's shoulder, kicked her legs again and clapped her hands in amusement to whatever Jeremy had cooked up. Apparently, Mia wasn't very happy with whatever her nephew did and proceeded to chase him around the viewpoint while James sighed and placed his hand over his face. Jessica tried to keep a straight face but ended up laughing instead.

"I'm glad they are all so happy," Roy commented. "Those kids had nothing close to the upbringing we had and I'm eternally grateful for that."

Riza chuckled. "We went through some shit."

"They'll never even know the worst of it."

"Good," Riza replied honestly. "They don't need to know about all of that."

"Want to keep them in this bubble forever, huh?" Roy joked.

Riza nudged him with her shoulder. "You know what I mean."

"Mum!" James called, waving them over. "Dad! Come on!"

"Give us two minutes," Riza called back. "Anyway," she added. "Where's all of this stuff coming from?"

Roy shrugged. "It's just something I think about when we're all together. I still can't believe my luck to have met you, even to this day." Roy chuckled. "I always used to question why you were even with me."

Riza turned fully to look at him. "Really?"

Roy nodded. "Remember back then? When my father kept me in line?"

"Of course I remember," Riza replied, as if it was a stupid question.

"Well, I never really saw anyone. I didn't have very many friends out of the fear they could be used against me." Roy shrugged. "Happiness wasn't really something I was used to."

"You never told me." Riza's brow furrowed, eyes filled with sorrow.

"It wasn't that important. Like I said, you blew all of that out of the water the moment I met you." Roy grinned. "You could have fallen for anyone, yet it was me. Upon realising that, I vowed I would do whatever I could to make sure you were happy." Roy took her hands in his, squeezing them tightly. "I fell short of that expectation once or twice, but I hope you have been happy, Riza."

Riza's expression changed. It softened and she lifted one of her hands to his cheek, her thumb caressing the skin under his eye. They fluttered closed and he leaned into her touch.

"Do you even have to ask that?" she replied softly.

The pressure of her lips against his was her response. A chorus of "ew!" and "yuck!" sounded from their grandkids, but they didn't care. They loved each other and they were happy.

"Come on, lovebirds!" Mia called with a grin. "I'd like to get those pictures taken some time today. Preferably in daylight!"

Riza grinned against his lips and Roy couldn't help but copy her.

Yeah, his kids and grandkids were all waiting expectantly for them. Roy still couldn't even believe he had grandkids, never mind four of them.

He remembered thinking one day while holding baby Mia in his arms that the future looked good. The future wasn't just good, it was incredible, far exceeding his expectations, and Roy wouldn't have traded it for the world.

* * *

 **and there we have it! i have gone through all the ideas i had for additional oneshots for this au and tbh i feel like this is the perfect point to end it**

 **of course i would love to keep writing more but i want to focus on other ideas and fics too!**

 **thank you all for reading and keeping up with this au. it really means the world to me!**


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